B365V2.89 - Tuxedos and travel plans

I don't know what I am doing here.  I have been sitting in Mellon Square for two hours now.  I know this because I can tell time.  With a clock and everything.

I have this numbing pain in my head right now.  It has come from one of two things, or a combination of them, 1) I have smoked too many cigarettes today.  Save me the lecture of how one is too many, I am living and dying on my own terms, not yours. 2) I haven't eaten enough today.  That doesn't mean I am starving, I am not some malnourished kid in a ditch with flies buzzing around him while Sally Struthers tells you, "You know, for just .30 a day, Matt could get all of the food he needs."  Great, so if three people donate, that means I get my .30 ration and that bitch is living large on .60.  But I am closer to "Fat Camp" contestant than I am to dying of starvation.

Remind me some day to do a glossary for you kids so you know just what the hell it is I am talking about.  For the record "Fat Camp" is what I call "The Biggest Loser".  Mind numbing reality television at its finest, where everyone can sit at home and feel good about themselves because they aren't as fat as the people on TV.

A school bus just pulled up outside the hotel here and a wedding party is getting out.  Yes I remember riding B19 to Elderton High School thinking if we tricked this ride out it would be the perfect thing for my wedding some day.  Some spinnie rims and a pissed off driver who has been slamming coffee since 4 am, that would make my day all kinds of extra special.

Lots of girls in very nice looking gowns and guys in tuxedos.  My tuxedo days are over, so if you got to see me in one consider yourself lucky, it won't happen again.  I have been in a tux 4 times in my life, two times for weddings (not mine rest assured, you don't get to be 46 and single by running off and getting married) and twice for trips to the ballet, one I have written about on this very page, it was one of my Hope moments, and once with Jen, which was about as anti-Hope a moment as one could get.  Verbal sparring is no more elegant in a tuxedo than it is in flip flops and shorts.  Speaking as a person who has done both, I would like to think I am an authority on the topic.

Okay, headed home now, I left the park and walked back to Smithfield News so I could pee, then grabbed a sandwich for dinner so I don't end up on one of those Sally Struthers commercials, and I grabbed a coffee, because it makes all kinds of sense to be drinking coffee at 1 am.  My plan is to go home and watch Friday's episode of DOOL on the computer (is it just me or has Abigail gotten hotter since she has been so trampy, and Serena is still the hottest on the show in my opinion, curves plus red hair and the bonuses that go on charisma checks with that).  Anyway, my bus is nearing its destination and no, I would not book a PAT bus for my wedding.  Anyway I am outtie, like a belly button.