Multiply 365 Day 279 - You got your zombie in my Jesus

So I was sitting down to breakfast yesterday. For those that read yesterday's blog, you know that I didn't make my weekly venture into the Strip District for breakfast, but rather opted for the Smithfield Cafe, a place just down the street from where I work. There food is good, not awesome,. but good. So I decided I would just settle in with my book and do some reading before a hearty breakfast of eggs (over easy of course), sausage, pancakes, toast and coffee. Not being sure how long I would end up working (it ended up being a 7.5 hour shift), I wanted to make sure my tummy wasn't growling in the middle of it.

Upon entering the restaurant, I saw one of those sign boards that some places have. Often they are used to describe the daily specials or what not, this one instead was there to greet a convention that was in town, the “Women of Faith” convention. Interesting to be sure, I had no idea that they would be in town, not that I wanted to attend mind you, just a slight piece of trivia that slipped my notice. Then again, if things don't fall within my sphere of interest, and a convention of faith of any kind would qualify for that, I wouldn't go out of my way to learn about it. So I basically just bumped into this piece of info.

When I got into the restaurant around 7am, there was one table of 6 women already seated. And it turned out that they were in fact attendees of the “Women of Faith” conference. Now, I am not going to sit here and belittle the women, they seemed nice enough, but they all looked like your typical bingo night attendees in that they were all older. Which brought a simple question from me, where are the hot chicks. I mean, if I am God, I think I can pull better than 60 year old bingo patrons. I shouldn't need someone saying “under the I, 19. that's I 19” in order to make it rain. I'm God for Christ sake. I should be having a tricked out ride with all of the lady's admiring my bling. Yet the best I can get are the women working the window at the DMV. What the hell is up with that?

That wasn't the only thing going on in Pittsburgh though. Another thing I was ignorant of was Zombie Fest. I am not even sure how Zombie Fest came to be, but there were a bunch of people all dressed like zombies walking around. If I were to look at a calendar, I would not see any great zombie related events that happened on Oct 8^th in the past, so why they would choose to celebrate a Zombie Fest on that day is beyond me.

Then it struck me. You know, the story of Jesus. How he rose from the dead. Jesus was a zombie. And with the Women of Faith in town, we are one Zombie Jesus away from getting these two groups under the same roof. I am even picturing “Jesus on a Stick” guy standing on the corner, but rather than shouting “Blasphemy!”, he would be there yelling “Eat the humans!” It is all in God's plan. The church and the zombies, working together to convert the heathens into either Christians or undead, whichever comes first.

Thankfully though no Zombie Jesus appeared, so for now I am safe. I remain very much an unbeliever and amongst the living. But I suppose I have to sleep some time.