Monday, April 4, 2011

Multiply 365 Day 93 - TITIT #9 (or to quote The Beatles TITIT #9, #9, #9, #9, #9....)

I got a few things on my chest and none of them are man boobs, so hi ho, hi ho, a ranting we will go.

President Barack Obama today started the process of his reelection, with a realistic possibility of raising as much as $1 billion dollars in his effort. How will he do this? It is simple really, money flows to power and to winners. Anyone looking to hedge their bets in 2012 in hopes of buying influence can either throw their money at an incumbent who will run unopposed, or pick Larry, Moe or Curly from the GOP and hope that they pick correctly. Does the President carry baggage going into a general election? Absolutely. But so do almost all, if not all of the Republicans that may be running against him, plus they will be spending money just to see who gets that privilege to be the Republican nominee.  Any talk of Hillary Clinton mounting a primary challenge to Barack Obama is just wishful thinking on the Republican's part, which speaks volumes when they consider the best challenge to Obama to not even be a member of their own party.

What is the deal with the Cialis ads these days? I was watching golf on Sunday (there was nothing else on) and I saw a few of these boner pill ads. You know the scenario, husband brushes against wife, they have that little spark and then it is on like Donkey Kong. Except it isn't. Because the man's junk doesn't work. But that not a problem with Cialis, because with it you are always ready, unless you aren't. Instead of then showing pictures of husband and wife getting their freak on, we get them going on a walk, or camping and pitching a tent (but not that tent) and I am left wondering just how damn long does it take for this pill to actually work anyway? Are we talking minutes, hours or days? Because I have to think if you have enough time to then pack to go camping, set up a camp site, pitch a tent, build a fire and you still haven't gotten it on, she may have just been better off saying "Look honey, I got this", went upstairs and pulled a toy out of her top drawer and pleasured herself than stand around waiting for their kids to graduate college before dad's member decides to kick into action.

So one of the topics of morning shows across America this morning was how bad the opening night of Charlie Sheen's "Look at me, I am a self destructive assclown" tour was Friday night in Detroit. Now I am not a defender of Charlie Sheen, his is a glorified script reader and little more. But upon hearing that people were so unhappy with the show that they began booing him and leaving the show, all I could think of when it came to the audience is, it serves you right. Let's be honest, you bought tickets because Charlie Sheen is a train wreck and you wanted front row seats. Well guess what? You paid for a train wreck and that is exactly what you got. Sheen is not a stand up comedian, his skill set has nothing to do with writing his own material, the people he surrounds himself with are not those that are what one would call compelling characters, so why would you expect anything remotely entertaining to come out of his performance? You paid to see a guy with minimal skills ply his non funny schtick, so why would you expect to get Shakespearean theater?

Another reason why I use more than just Facebook is on display right now. As I type this Facebook is having one of those shit the bed moments where nothing loads right, pages don't come up, searches come up blank, just an all around clusterfuck. Not that I will ever adopt Twitter, me and 140 characters just don't mix, but if I learned anything from Yahoo and the whole 360 experience it is too never leave all of my social eggs in one basket.

I will never, ever buy a bag of Cornnuts. If I know that when I eat average, every day corn it basically passes right through me, why would I want to make that process even more painful buy having nuts packed inside the corn? What, glass wasn't available?

I know I am getting old, not because I am not keeping up with musical trends, or because I couldn't name half of the so called celebrities of today, but because I can sit down and watch an episode of "Katie Brown Workshop" and think, you know, she's kinda hot. Truth be told she would be hotter with leather boots and a riding crop, but that is a blog for another time.

And on that rather not so pleasant note (well it was pleasant for me) I am outtie, like a bellybutton.

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