Saturday, June 25, 2016

B365V3.36 - 47 is not the new 46

Today was as close as a near death experience as I have had since the wallet at the bottom of Schenley Pool incident last summer.  But the fun actually started last night.  I stopped at Bootleggers for a couple of post work libations where I was greeted with some bad news, one of the regulars from Jimmy's passed away, Mel.  Apparently he was diagnosed with cancer a while back and passed away about a week ago.  Mel and I weren't particularly close, we would talk in the bar and what not, maybe buy each other a drink here or there, but I knew better than to shoot pool with him, he would kick my ass.  Though through my years of torturing people with my juke box selections, I did manage to get Mel hooked on Keb Mo, and that is the extent of my musical influence on anyone.

Anyway I stayed at the bar for maybe three beers and then walked across the street to Larry and Carol's to grab something to eat.  Longtime readers of the blog (2100+ entries now) know that L&C was a place I worked back in my radio days, as radio paid so well a second job was mandatory just to get by.  Anyway I stopped in a checked out the menu before ordering a meatball wedge and fries.  I got my feast and took it back to my apartment to eat in the comfort of my own home.  For those not in the know a wedge is a pizza dough stretched out and the items that get cooked, in this instance the meatballs and cheese are placed on half of the stretched out dough, then the other half is folded over and the entire thing is placed in the pizza oven.  When it is done, you open it back up and add the cold items, like lettuce, tomato, onion, etc.

So I get my cornucopia of food back to my place and begin to eat, when I notice the dough is under done, it is all chewy and what not, but hunger beat common sense so I ate half of it before falling asleep.  I woke up a little later, ate some more and went back to bed.

My alarm goes off this morning and I shut it off and went to roll over when a paralyzingly pain shot through my right side, from my abdomen all the way up to my shoulder.  Had it been the other side I would have though heart attack (yeah, like I have a heart).  I managed to finagle myself to the edge of the bed to lower myself to the floor to be in an upright position.  I located my cell phone because it hurt bad enough that I was on the verge of calling off work (which never happens) and calling an ambulance.  But I keep aspirin on my headboard for a reason, so I grabbed the bottle and swallowed 4 of them, if I could manage this pain, I could be functional. I swallow the aspirin with a swig of iced tea, next thing I know I get the feeling I am going to throw up.  I make it to the bathroom and begin to projectile vomit.  What is that anyway, isn't all vomit projectile of some degree, it's not like a kid playing with his mashed potatoes, squeezing them out between his lips.   Likewise, vomit has a more immediate means of letting loose, nobody dribbles it out and let's it run down their chin onto their shirt.

So I hack up my aspirin and anything else that will come out, I feel slightly better, now it just feels like my abdomen is being stabbed and underneath my right shoulder blade is also being stabbed, a shitty condition to work in but it beats being paralyzed on my bed.  If this is what being 47 is going to feel like, I will go back to being 46.

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