Thursday, January 28, 2016

B365V3.5 - Reboots on the ground

     So I am at work today, just minding my business, pulling numbers off of reports on the computer when I see the windows update icon on the bottom.  Not the switch to Windows 10 nonsense, just the icon that lest you know if updates are pending.  Given we hadn't done updates in a few months (I shut off automatic updates because updating and rebooting closes out are ability to do debit and credit transactions unless someone is right at the computer when it reboots).  I click on the icon and we are 35 updates behind, but I am there and since it needs done I decide to gt the updates.  It takes about 10 or 15 minutes and then it asks if I want to reboot.  Of course, might as well get the updates up and running, so I select the restart (all the while avoiding the Windows 10 nonsense, they can't give that shit away to me).  I just want the updates for Windows 7 Professional, nothing else.  Windows 10 is best described as the possibility of having really freaky sex with someone.  She starts talking about handcuffs and nipple wax and blindfolds but when the sex actually happens it is just as vanilla as all of the other sex you ever had.  And that is supposing the sex even happens.  Windows 10 can also be a cock tease. 

     So I reboot the back office computer, which shuts down the registers on the floor for a few minutes as well, but the computer perks right back to life, save for the credit and debit processing, but since I am there I start up the one program and get it running, then open the service manager to restart the other two programs that are needed, except the service manager doesn't open, it keeps coming up with an error code.  Now I am no techie savant, when shit goes bad I go to people who are paid more than me to fix such things, so I call our register people at Roth Cash register, I get Arthur on the phone, explain the issue and he logs in remotely from his location,, does some hocus pocus jazz and when he is done my desktop looks neater (few icons abound all willy nilly) and I have credit and debit abilities on my sales floor.  All hail technology.  Taa daa and all that jazz. 

     I finish with my sales numbers and balancing the books and go to the bank, do my deposits and make my way back to work.  I still have two reports I have to print and then fax to Ed, our shift breakdowns for sales and a report covering the individual packs of cigarettes we have sold over the last 24 hours, what we call a movement report.  So I get back to work and pull the movement report for cigarettes, it pops up and nice and cool like, I hit print on the report and nothing happens.  I check the printer queue, there is an error printing the report.  I do my checks, is there paper in the printer (yes), is brian's computer on, while we are on the same network the printer is plugged into his com puter, so if it is off no one has access to the printer (it is on), I troubleshoot the printer at my desk, it says any existing errors are fixed so I try again, still nothing, just the error message in the queue.  Looks like I will have to call Arthur again at Roth and see if there is a problem since the reboot earlier.  Arthur is busy on the phone with another client, so I get the second in command in the techie department.  I explain what is happening, he goes in remotely and tries a few things, no luck.  I go back to Brian's computer, which while on the network, does not have any of the register software installed on it, so I couldn't just go to his desk and pull the reports.  I try printing something at his desk, the printer does indeed work.  Meanwhile Commander Riker is having no luck on the back office computer, he eve tries opening the network and selecting the computer I am on, but is says my computer (Brian's) is no longer part of the network or some such nonsense.  His final conclusion is I need to buy a new printer for  the back office computer, which while a possible solution doesn't solve my problem with getting Ed his reports today.  And given Ed's utter disdain for computers, I can't email him the reports, I have to get them and then fax them to him.    So I fish a flash drive out of my desk, copy the reports to the flash drive and then take the drive back to Brian's computer so I can print them up and then fax them. 

     With that out of the way, I go back to the back office computer and start poking around, before finally giving up and just deciding to reboot that back office computer again.  It take a long time before getting back to a place where it can be online again, once again shutting down the computer upstairs and even when they come back the credit and debit are both down.  It takes about 10 minutes before I get internet access again, so on a hunch I try using the printer again, still nothing.  I go into the network again, I see Brian's computer (called Johns-PC for network purposes, I replaced John almost two years ago, and then Dee about a year ago so I am 3, 3, 3 employees rolled into one) on the network, I click on it and there is the printer, so I click on it and add it to the network.  I try printing again and hocus pocus, it works.  I let out a really loud primal scream type thing in the office, like a animal that has been let out of a trap on one of those nature shows on PBS, the I escaped work, only about 3 hours behind schedule. 

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