Sunday, December 4, 2011

Multiply 365 Day 316 - Updates? We don't need no stinking updates

     I guess it is about time for my monthly update. Okay, so I don't have a monthly update per se, but it has been a little while since I talked about me here.  Maybe that is a good thing, at times when I talk too much about me I feel I come off as whiny.  But recently I haven't been talking about myself as much, maybe my life isn't whiny enough to be blog worthy.

     Because really life has been okay.  As far as work goes, well, it is work.  By definition it can't be all great, but it's not all bad either.  No real complaints, and hey, I did get another pair of hockey tickets for Monday night's game against the Bruins.  How much bitching can one do when they show up for work and someone hands them two $210 ducats to a Pens game?  Really?

      And my personal life is still moving along pretty swimmingly too.  Jen and I have been together for 2 and half months now, hardly long in the grand scheme of things, but every relationship has to start somewhere, and I would like to think we are starting off pretty darn well.  The biggest problem is the problem that plagues all online relationships I'd imagine, just the desire to want to be there when things aren't going well and knowing you can't be.  Sure, you do the best you can with what you have, but there is something to being able to look someone in the eyes, or take them in your arms when they are upset and online you just can't do that.  Not that we are awash in bad times, just the opposite in fact, she makes me happy everyday.  Sometimes it is just a simple note in my email at work, an evening where we are chatting and the time flows effortlessly by, or going to the mailbox and seeing something in there from her, whatever the means she just makes every day a little more special.  

     And there my friends is the blogging problem.  How can I come here and bitch about my life when there is nothing to bitch about?  If being happy means I don't blog as much, well I can live with that.

15 comments:

  1. Not a bad thing but an online relationship and an in person relationship are different animals entirely. You need to work on the in person side it has been over 2 months, you need to meet up.

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  2. There are plenty of reasons why we haven't, not the least of which being the distance (2000 or so miles) and the fact we both have full time jobs, we can't just run off at a moment's notice. So for the time being we both do what we can, sending photos back and forth, talking for hours each day, send little surprises to each other in the mail, etc. until we do get a chance to meet.

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  3. Plane, tickets, the holidays...and go.

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  4. I think it about time I comment on this!!!

    I have know Matt for almost three months. We talk for 5 to 6 hours a day. We are both deeply in love with each other... That we both want to take this slow..To rush into a relationship is very wrong. We want our love for each other to last a life time. We will both meet in the summer time.

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  5. You aren't rushing into anything if you meet in person. It doesn't mean you are rushing a relationship by actually meeting. It means you are actually having the relationship once you are together in person. Before that it isn't real. Online and over the phone is always an edited version of life. I know people who have had online relationships, had a few visits and decided to move across the country to be together. Out of 5, 1 has worked. I won't even get involved with someone I can't meet up with in person. Too easy for life to be a fairy tale and when reality sets in there's a lot of time lost. You need to meet sooner then later. Plane tickets aren't that expensive. Even meet someplace in the middle. Then neither are on common ground. You just need to do it and be face to face.

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  6. Well I would just suggest then we have different perceptions of reality, because I have friends on this very site who met online, took their time getting to know each other before finally meeting and now are happily married. The relationship Jen and I have is very real to the two people that matter most, that being her and I. Nobody else really matters in that regard, so we will continue on at a pace that is comfortable for both of us.

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  7. It is not real until you are in person. It is a friendship but nothing else. I don't know why you are afraid to meet in person. If there is something between you there should be a drive to be together in person. If someone doesn't want to meet me in person and keeps coming up with excuses I feel they have something to hide. I have nothing to hide and don't balk at meeting people face to face.

    Look this is your business but you don't have anythign but an online friendship until you are actually together. You don't get the truth about people online and on the phone because you only hear what they think you want to see and hear. Reality is life, online isn't reality

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  8. Well then, since you are online, you aren't real.

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  9. I never claimed to be in a relationship with you either. You don't really know me. You know barely anything about me. There is an online friendship, but no actual relationship. I have offered a couple times when I was in Pittsburgh to meet you for lunch. I'm there a couple times a year.

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  10. No you haven't, but if nothing online is real per se, then that would include friendships, they would be just as illusionary as relationships in that regard. There is nothing any more tangible to an online friendship, you either believe it is there or you don't. Like I said before, the only two people that matter when it comes to Jen and I and how we perceive what we have, is us two. Nobody else matters at all. Sure, people can have opinions about it, based on what they know, but as the old saying goes, opinions are like assholes, everybody has one.

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  11. You and I won't agree on this. You are in love with someone you have never met. It may turn out ok, it might not. You will not know until you actually spend time with someone. Until then you know about her what she wants you to know and she knows what you want her to know. Look I knew someone on Multiply who I got into hiking. She weighed 380+ pounds. Yet all the time she posted that she was laying out in her bikini or taking the trash out naked. Everyone thought she was hot. She didn't post pictures of herself, or nothing recent. She was a complete and utter lie. The only thing real about her was her name and that she was female. I got sick and tired of her lies and the crazy shit and dropped her from my friends list. I know a guy who ended up quitting his job as a cop, giving up his apartment and moving to California to be with the online woman of his dreams. He was home in under 2 weeks. In person they got on each others nerves. They had a 3 year online relationship and only got together for weekends a couple times a year.

    So maybe I'm an asshole. I really don't care what you think of me. I'm just saying you are not in a relationship until you are in person. Until then it is an edited fantasy. Delete me, block me, do what ever you want it won't change the truth. Not meeting isn't taking it slow it is avoiding some truth.

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  12. Just as online friendships are nothing but edited fantasies then so you can't sit here and say you can have one but not the other. If you do you are just a hypocrite.

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  13. When did I say they aren't? As I said online are edited lives. You don't know me. You know very little about me. I am NOT a hypocrite and am offended you accused me of being one. Just because you don't like what I am saying doesn't mean you have to make me the problem.

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  14. You know all I said was that you guys need to get together in person. I don't understand why you become so defensive when that was suggested. I would think if you were serious about a relationship you would want to be physically near each other. Instead you got defensive.

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  15. And all I said was that Jen and I do plan on meeting, just not yet for a variety reasons, most of which are really nobody's fucking business so I am not going to spell them out for everyone who reads this page. You want to say I don't have a relationship, fine, that's your choice, I really don't give a shit what you or anyone else thinks about it. It really doesn't need validation from a third party as far as I am concerned.

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