Weekend Update

Here it is, almost a quarter till 1am on Wednesday morning and I am sort of getting ready to get back in the saddle at work in about 6 hours.  I can't determine whether or not this is a good or bad thing, so I will just call it a thing and leave it at that.

First I would like to say thanks to those who stopped by the page and sent along their condolences, much appreciated.  While I put the original obituary on the page, the fine folks at the funeral home took some of the photos we had and put together an online video tribute.  Not saying you have to look, after all by and large I am betting most of you don't know the people in the photos, but if you are interested it can be found here.

For the rest of you, actually for all of you I guess this story picks up right about where I left off, 4am Friday morning.  Obviously the phone call was a pretty shitty way to start the day and my mom asked if I wanted to come home in the morning or wait till the evening on Friday.  Since technically I didn't expect anything to happen Friday, other than family members calling more family members to share the news I opted to go ahead in to work.  After all, we were already running short handed, with Rick off for his anniversary and Belinda needing Friday off that was going to put us two people short.  Me not being there when I could be there would have just made the problem worse, especially with two trucks coming in and me needing to place three orders for the following week.  Far better to just go in and do my Benito Mussolini and make sure the trains run on time and keep my brain occupied than sit around dwelling on everything. 

When my grandmother was first readmitted to the hospital and subsequently hospice care I had cleared the path to get some time off of work at a moment's notice, so I knew getting time off wouldn't be a problem, but there was no sense taking time off just for taking time offs sake.  Instead I figured I would do my work thing and let Ed know that I would be taking Monday and Tuesday off the following week.  With me already having weekends off, Saturday and Sunday weren't going to be a problem, but since I originally didn't know the times of the services (I posted the obit after work on Friday, which is when I first learned the dates and times) I was just working with what I deemed a rough sketch in my mind, assuming that the earliest a viewing would be would be Saturday, if they do two days of viewings that would be Sunday and the burial Monday.  I was right in my timing but for the wrong reasons, as there was only one day of viewing, Monday and the funeral on Tuesday, so my days off were on target but not because of my reasoning.  Instead my cousin Melanie was flying in from Dallas and she wasn't to arrive until Saturday night and another cousin Dennis was trying to get time off from the military, since he was currently stationed in Honolulu.  As it turns out they wouldn't let him go, since he had only three weeks left on his current deployment and while the military will let you fly home for immediate family, they are less forgiving when you get to the more diistant relations such as grandparents so he got stuck in Hawaii, a torture of which I hope to someday have.

Anyway I make it into work and start doing some of my daily tasks and the first manager to arrive is Dee.  She says that Wayne, who works with me most of the time, called off.  The thing is Wayne picked up a gig for two weeks working at the US Women's Open, being held in Oakmont, a suburb of Pittsburgh.  He was working as security out there, which was fine with me, if you can make a couple of extra sheckels by all means do.  My job is cool for a few reasons, but money wise there are certainly better options out there and if someone finds a gig that wil pay them more I am the first to tell them to grab it.  His job was apparently overnights, just making sure no one messed with the golf course between rounds and what not.  To me that is easy money, the kind that almost grows on trees.  I would have just taken the two weeks off and been done with it, but Wayne told management that he could still work a few mornings each week, Monday, Wednesday and Friday from 7am-3pm.  Well the first week he ended up calling off two of the three days, now in the second week with us already shorthanded on Friday he calls off again.  Now I have no confirmation on what happened since I haven't been there since Friday but Ed said he was going to fire him.  If only he would have just requested both weeks off he would have been fine, but you can't say you will be there and then not show up three out of 6 days.  Now since I haven't been to work in a few days I will find out later today if the potential firing actually took place, though I do know his name wasn't on the schedule for this week so.......

Meanwhile on the very same day Sierra, who happens to be Belinda's daughter, also caught the firing ax.  She was working at our other location downtown.  Unlike us, who are open 24 hours, they close up shop each night at 6pm, and are also closed on weekends.  But as luck would have it the bosses were reviewing the surveillance footage of the store because they are having some problem down there with the air conditioning and what not, plus they had just recently fired Patty and I am sure they are checking up on things when what do they see but Sierra locking the doors an hour early and going home.  Now I don't know who was working with her and whether the entire crew got canned, but since she was the one with keys I know she got axed and that one I don't need to see the schedule to confirm.  I can't see how you could talk yourself out of that termination.

Also of note, you may remember the big hassle I went through about a month back, because we closed the one store and moved everything down to the other store.  The thing was, on the store we closed we had a lease for a couple of years yet, so we could use the space however we wanted, but on the store we moved everything to the newest lease that we signed was a month to month basis.  On the one hand it is good, if our store down there doesn't work we can close in short order, but on the other hand it also leaves you at the mercy of the leaseholder, if he can find a tenant who may pay more money, you got 30 days to pack up you shit and go.  Needless to say, because I am blogging bad news ad naseum here, we are moving back to the previous location meaning all of the work I had done before is all but useless.  Friday was very much turning into a day where life was seeing just how many peters would fit into my asshole at the same time.

The only plus was that I went to Ed and told him I needed the two days off, and even though he had potentially fired two people and was looking to start the week short handed he graciously just said to take as much time as I need, then asked me if I needed any money as well.  While I imagine the money would have be a loan, I was okay for cash, after all I wasn't springing for the funeral or anything like that.  Mostly I would just be buying junk at home, smokes and what not and not really footing the big bills.

So I made it home Friday night and posted the obit on here and packed my things, since my family wanted to pick me up, I could have just as easily taklen the bus, but who am I to turn down a free ride.  My mom calls and says they are leaving around 4pm, so I think I have about an hour to pack, but it ends up being almost three hours until they get all of their ducks in a row.  Rather than go straight home, we stop for dinner at Spaghetti Benders (again).  I think there are only a handful of places that my family stops, that being the most frequent.  The only thing I can say about the dinner was I want the brunette waitress back.  When we sat down, a brunette came and wiped down the table, and I admit she was okay to look at, but then another waitress comes to take our order and the best adjective I can come up with without being too insulting would be sloooooow.  Bad enough the Pirate game is on the TV above the bar, where the Buccos were in the process of finding newer and more creative ways to lose, and the live entertainment was one of those trendy, strum a guitar on a stool type ballad singers who was taking an ax to The Pretenders "Back on the Chain Gang", but the waitress was moving so slow that I could have swore I heard the tortoise in the kitchen yelling "Pick it up a little, will ya".  I would suggest a new line of work, perhaps the Department of Motor Vehicles is hiring, because waitressing isn't going to pay the bills long term.

After dinner it was home and to nappy land, which comes quite easily after being roused at 4am under less that stellar circumstances. 

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Wednesday evening

Okay, I took a break, I wish I could say I slept before work but I just couldn't get to sleep, so instead I laid there before finally just getting up and getting the day at work started.  Of interest is that while I had all but assumed Sierra would be fired, apparently Belinda lobbied Ed on her behalf and saved Sierra's job.  Now I get a mom wanting to gelp out her daughter, I just don't know what is to gain by throwing yourself out there for something that was so blatantly wrong, now anything Sierra does wrong isn't going to look bad on just her, but Belinda as well for defending her.  But hey kids, not my problem.  I do know that Wayne hasn't been brought back yet, I guess I will find out for sure one way or the other on Friday, but they hired a new kid, Joe, who did okay for his third day there, his first two he was literally thrown to the wolves with no one there to really show him the ropes.  I will not get my hopes too high, but I have worked with far worse in my 41 years of existence.  And truth be told, I all but expected to be pulling 10-12 hour days for the immediate future, now maybe I will not have to.  Okay, intermission is over, time to get back to our story.

Saturday morning was 4 cups of coffee just to get the brain firing properly.  Mike got up and said he was going to get his car, you know, the Corvette from photo I posted from a while back.  He sometimes takes it out when the weather is nice and it was looking to be a pretty nice day, at least from a meteorlogical standpoint.  So he takes off and is gone for a while, I don't even know what I did, maybe tinkered on the laptop, maybe watched some TV, when the phone rings.  Apparently Saturday was the scheduled day for our family reunion and Mike was out showing off his car for the huddled masses.  Now I realize that given my grandmother had just pased away the previous day there was little to no chance of notifying anyone about cancelling or rescheduling, and even less of a chance of changing the date of the reservations for the sportsman's club where the event is anually held, but this being my first of even hearing about it (usually my grandmother made sure to see I was sent an invitation with the date and time on it) and the rather somber mood I was already in, the last thing I wanted to do was be reunion-ing.  I don't begrudge those that decided to go, for some I am sure they hadn't heard the news yet and others probably used the opportunity to try and keep themselves busy so as not to think about things, but I fell into neither category, I just wasn't in the mood.  I probably pissed off a few relatives, but had I been there I would have pissed off more than a few, I was pretty much in that anti social frame of mind.

The only other thing of merit that really happened Saturday was again we went out to eat, it became a recurring theme for most of my trip home, as well as nobody letting me buy.  I usually got stuck just leaving the tip, and trust me that first meal with the horrible waitress, had I bought the meal, I wouldn't have tipped at all, she was that bad, but since that was all I had to spring for I threw some money on the table.  Saturdays choice of restaurant was Tres Amigos, I swear my family just goes to the same places again and again, but at least this time I wasn't the only one eating Mexican, Mike actually got burritos, I went with the Taco Salad and of course my mom went with chicken and french fries.  Damn it Pam, now I have that "Better Off Dead" thing in my head and I have to keep from typing French bread, French Dressing and Peru.  Sorry, that was about as inside of a joke as you can get on one of my blogs, referring back to another blog I recently commented on.

Sunday we planned on going out to my uncle Mouse's house (his name is Richard but everyone has called him Mouse since long before I was born) to drop off money for the flowers for the funeral and just do some visiting.  Thankfully I brought swimming trunks and took advantage of the pool, which while not heated, was surpisingly comfortable at 84 degrees when we climbed in.  I managed to get a little bit of a sun burn, but it was worth it. 

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Thursday evening

Dang, another day being spent on this entry.  At some point I just need to bang this thing out and be done with it.  Perhaps this will be that day.  On the work front all I can say is there is still no news on whether or not Wayne has actually been fired or not, heck no one in the office even knows.  Two different managers have given me two different answers to that question.  Wayne did stop by to talk to Ed today but Ed refused to meet with him, he actually said not to let Wayne near the office.  So the soap opera continues for a few more days, since Ed will be meeting with our supplier, Sledd, in West Virginia regarding the deli section we are trying to add to the store.  The next day we may get an update on our little version of "As the World Turns" will be on Monday at the earliest.

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Friday evening

Yes another delay, and this one is related to our overall story, so in that regard it is an update to the Weekend Update, but since we haven't gotten to where we are going yet I will just add it as part of the story.  Suffice it to say that it was enough to piss me off to the point I didn't want to blog anymore last night.  I would like to credit my stoppage to procrastination, but instead I am just going to attribute it to its rightful source, anger.

When we last left off of the major theme of this entry, my grandmother's passing, we were up to Sunday.  I understand that we held things back a bit because of trying to get all of the family home, but part of me was also just wanting to get everything going.  I had been home since Friday evening and other than the trip to my uncle's house, I really had done nothing other than eat out, and life's general lack of inertia was starting to make me a little antsy.  About the only thing unique about Sunday night was that we actually ate at home for a change that night, roast and potatoes with a salad, just solid, home cooked food for a change. 

Monday would be the day of the viewings, one afternoon and one evening.  I'll admit that one of the reasons funerals kind of creep me out is that often the people in the casket look a little to plastic or fake for my tastes, almost like the person who has passed away has been replaced by a cheaper imitation knock off.  That wasn't the case here, it was probably the best my grandmother had looked in a few years, not that she ever looked bad to me, but just more restful than the last few times I had seen her.  The funeral home also had the video I linked to above playing in a continuous loop for those that hadn't seen it yet (I had already pulled it up on Mouse's computer the day before and we all gathered around for a look at it).  The afternoon viewing was unique in that a couple of the elder members of the Elderton community showed up, Vic Schall and Russell Brumbaugh.  Vic for years ran one of the few insurance agency offices in the town, a State Farm office and quite a few Eldertonians were clients of his, my grandparents included, until he retired.  Russell Brumbaugh was formerly an English teacher at Elderton High School, and when I had him, in 9th grade I think, I thought that he was a tad bit older, and that was 25 years ago or so, yet here he was looking as good as ever.

After the first viewing many of the family members headed back to my grandmother's house, where of course there was more than enough food.  Not sure what the theory is behind food and funerals, maybe eating helps people preclude thinking, I am not sure.  Of note was that one of my uncles, Will, didn't join us.  I don't know what to make of it, maybe he was upset about something, or maybe he just wanted to grieve in his own time and manner, after all I had blown off the family reunion two days prior.  One of the things that had been coming up prior to my grandmother's passing, and something we will get to more later on, was what she actually wrote in her will.  In many ways the whole thing had created some much unneeded tension.  Not that my grandmother was wealthy or anything, but she lived comfortably. By the time of her and my grandfathers retirements they had built enough of a nest egg that they could withstand most anything bad financially that would come their way.  As a result there is some money invovled, how much I do not know, probably enough that it would be a noticeable sum of money without being anywhere near lottery winnings type cash.  Because no one knew what was written in the will, there was some much unneeded he said/she said goings on among some of the siblings.  Just bullshit as far as I am concerned, my only concern was my grandmother and nothing more, everything else was just noise.  But I can't ignore the fact that that may have contributed to Will passing on the family gettogether between viewings.

The evening viewing was more heavily attended, people tend to work during the day and what not, but there were some people there that I hadn't seen in ages as well, including Andrew Kimmel, who I graduated with way back in 1987.  His family owns a large farm right outside of Elderton and while I believe Andrew went on to Penn State University after high school, I know he eventually came back, and is still a member of my grandmother's church.  There were some other people as well, like Sandy, who my mom used to run around with for a time after my parents divorced but long before she remarried her current husband.  And of course there were lots of people that I wouldn't know who they were no matter how long I stared at them.  The siblings formed a line leading up to the casket, a line that had a tendency of not moving because Mouse was at the very head of it, being the oldest, and he would have a tendency much like my blogs, to just talk and talk. 

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Saturday afternoon

Yes, again I delved away from the blog to go and do some other things. Right now I am waiting for the Canadian Football League game to pop up on ESPN 3, since it is broadcast on the computer and is better than any of the TV offerings that are out there currently. I had to drag my butt into work to place the order for Monday, things were a bit of a mess on Friday so I didn't get it done then. On the bright side, Joe, who was hired in place of Wayne pending a determination on what actually will happen to Wayne, has done an admirable job this week, given he was pretty much thrown to the wolves during his first week. With me not being there Monday or Tuesday, he was stuck with the grocery order and the 7 UP delivery on Monday, then the Pepsi delivery on Tuesday, and while some things weren't put exactly where they should be, given he was working without a net I was content that he managed to get quite a few things done. I was pretty impressed and when I got a chance to work with him on Wednesday and Thursday he still seemed to be doing a pretty good job. Friday was a train wreck, though it really wasn't Joe's fault, usually we have two deliveries, one from Coke and a grocery order that arrive, and I have to meet with reps from Pepsi and 7 Up plus place a grocery order for Monday as well. All of that would normally make for a busy day, but Ed scheduled a meeting with Sledd and took Rick with him, which meant I had to do some of Rick's work as well, so I am running to the bank for change for the weekend and taking deposits down for the store as well, plus I had to price some items that come in daily, deli sandwiches, salads and what not and see that they got out. Plus the deliveries, which normally show up relatively early, didn't show up until much later, groceries didn't come in until almost noon and Coke arrived somewhere around 1pm, usually they arrive at 10am and 8am respectively, and since I can't do a grocery order until we put the current delivery away and I can see what it is we are missing, it just pushed everything further back than things needed to be. As a result I ended up staying late and still didn't get everything done that needed doing, so I trekked in today to finish up, as well as making a detour for breakfast, some chocolate chip and banan pancakes from Pamela's, with a few cups of coffee thrown in in case the sugar rush wasn't enough

But enough of that, I was telling a story and it is probably better that I get back to it.

Tuesday was the day of the actual funeral and burial. The male grandchildren, myself included, were the pall bearers. To Mouse's credit, he asked everyone rather than assuming they would do it, though for me the answer was a no brainer, of course I would. So it was me, and my cousins Bobby, Josh, Tim, Christopher, and Scott. The service was nice, some people got up to say some kind words, I am usually pretty speechless in such occasions and this was no different. Of course after the fact I can sit here and think about what I might have said, but at the time my mind was just drawing a complete blank. After the service was the trip to the cemetary. Because Elderton is so small, it literally was almost a stone's throw from the funeral home, just right across the highway. There were a few words said by the preacher, then anyone who wanted one was able to take a flower from one of the arrangements that were sent to the funeral home, I got a yellow rose which I laid on top of the casket. I would like to say that was the end of things but it wasn't. That was when I found out that the siblings were going to grandma's house for the reading of the will. I found this a tad bit tasteless, hell they hadn't even finished putting the coffin in the ground and already people were worried about how the estate was going to be divvied up. Thankfully it was just the kids, no one else was to be there, so I got to avoid the whole mess. Apparently it went okay, at least as okay as things like that can go and considering all of the chattering that had happened beforehand, that should count for something. I went back down to Mouse's house where Bobby, Scott and I hopped in the pool.

It took a little while, but eventually my mom and her husband came down and I climbed out of the pool and headed home to pack and get ready for the trip back to Pittsburgh. Apparently Mouse got the house in the will, the rest of the siblings were given equal shares of whatever monies my grandmother may have, that has yet to be determined and I haven't inquired about how much money is actually involved because I really don't care.

This would normally be the end of our story and I would say anyone wishing to comment can do so now, though I am not sure what comment could actually be left on a blog like this, but sadly the story continues. I am putzing around online Thursday night, I head over to Facebook to tinker with some apps and what not when I see a message from my Aunt Carrie in my inbox. She would be my grandmother's daughter in law, married to my Uncle Bud, the middle child of the three my grandmother had (in age they would go Mouse, Linda (my mom), Bud, Amy, Will). I crack it open to see what is what and here is what I get

　

"

Matt, Bud and the rest of the family are really worried about your Mom health wise and other wise. When they divide the Money from Grandma's estate they are worried that Mike will convince her to do something with it that would only benefit him. They are worried that she might need the money down the road for her health care. Thought it might be a good idea if she put it into a account with her name and yours so he couldn't get to it. We are not trying to be smart but are truely worried about her considering the situation. If you need to call Bud let me know what would be a good time for him to call you. Love Carrie"

Now I know my mom has some health issues, she had a minor stroke a while back, and while not old by any standard, she isn't young either at 61. There are times when I catch her mixing up names and what not, though I am prone to do that myself from time to time, if not outright just forgetting them. That being said, while I am concerned about my mom's health, the rest of this message just out and out pissed me the fuck off. I know that my mom and her husband can spend money unwisely from time to time, but last I checked it was their money and they don't exactly have debt collectors knocking down their door. And I sure as fuck don't want to have anything to do with any inheritance, if my mom wants to open an account with the money for herself, since assuredly it was left specifically to her in the will, that is fine with me, but don't slap my name on it. And whatever she decides to do with her inheritance, it really isn't anybody's business but hers, just as what any of the other kids do with their money is none of anybody else's business. I believe my reply, though somewhat tempered, went like this

Greetings, like you and everyone else I am worried about my mom's health as well. As for the money from grandma's will, that stuff is really none of my business and honestly I don't want to make it my business. The only thing that really matters to me is that my grandmother is gone and the memories I have from my times with her, how any of her children, including my mom, opt to spend their inheritance is not something I am going to get involved with. If my mom wants a separate account for her inheritance, she is more than welcome to set one up, but I don't want my name anywhere near it. It just isn't how I want to remember my grandmother.

Now today is the first day that all of the kids are supposed to get together at the house and start going through personal effects, and if anyone has something specific they want they are allowed to take. My mom asked if there was anything I might like, and I said no, the further I keep myself from this clusterfuck the happier I am going to be. I recieved a couple of things from my grandmother in her last couple of months, one was a letter that she wrote me after Mother's Day. I had taken the opportunity to send her flowers when I sent some to my mom, and on the card I just signed it from all of the grandkids, something I had done previously as well, under the guise that I really didn't want to take credit for it so better to just sign it from all of us, but someone spilled the beans this year and told her it was me. As a result she sent me a nice letter thanking me for the flowers and just some simple goings on on the home front. The second was that a week before she passed away she took the time to send me a birthday card, something I told her and Brandi's graduation party she need not worry about, but that is just the type of person she was. Even during her last week as her organs were starting to fail her one of the things she was worried about was who was taking the coffee pot to the family reunion. Some people would worry about getting better, yet she was worried about everyone else. So I have my keepsakes, I need not go pawing through her personal belongings looking for a memento or two, and I sure as hell don't need to be attached to her estate in any way shape or form.

See, this stuff is still making me angry, two days later, so you can imagine how bad this blog might have turned out had I not stopped from time to time. That being said I am stopping for the last time here, I got enough proof reading to keep me busy for a while.