Asshat - Low hanging fruit

It has been quite a while since I have done an Asshat post, but if ever there was a time swim in that pool again, now would be it.  Honestly I thought my last rant about the airplane crash in San Francisco would be enough on the topic, the idea that somehow this would be considered a challenge, that some media could outdo even the idea of reporting on people who weren't on the plane.   Like any good challenge though, the fine folks at KTVU were more that willing to pick up the gauntlet and run with it..  The following is so Asshat-worthy, you could make a legitimate case for it taking the place of Miss Teen South Carolina's place on the front of this blog.  Yes, it is that bad.  Lights, camera and action!

Asshat - The Christmas edition

Yes, it has been a while since I added an Asshat to the page, but really this has to be here.  After all, it embodies that which is Asshat worthy, a combination of the requisite amounts of tragedy and stupidity.  So your Christmas nominee for Asshat is one Wayne Mitchell, who died after eating cocaine out of his brother's ass.  No word on what killed him, the coke or the ass.  But here with the highlights, ........

Man Eats Cocaine From Brother's Butt, Dies

Police: Man Trying To Hide Drug Evidence In Squad Car

POSTED: 9:13 am CST December 20, 2011

UPDATED: 9:18 am CST December 20, 2011

A South Carolina man's brother died after police said he was forced to eat cocaine hidden in his brother's backside.Both brothers were taken into custody on allegations they had drugs in their car.But police told Charleston, S.C., TV station WCIV there were additional drugs hidden in 23-year-old Deangelo Mitchell's backside.Officers said Deangelo Mitchell convinced his brother, 20-year-old Wayne Mitchell, to swallow the ounce of cocaine to hide the evidence. He died soon afterward."It's sickening," North Charleston Police Chief Jon Zumalt told WCIV. "I got upset when I saw the thing. I was pretty shocked on it."Deangelo Mitchell already bonded out of jail on the drug charge, but now police are looking for him again on charges of involuntary manslaughter.

Asshat - No, that's church

Me and religon get along like oil and water most days.  This day isn't any different.  This week's Asshat winner is the Catholic Church, which is using an argument in court that it can't be held accountable for the actions of its priests raping kids because, well, the priests aren't employees.  Excuse me?  That seems quite funny to me, considering how much the church has done to fascillitate raping kids, moving priests from parish to parish rather than having them face their due day in court.  And let's not even mention Bernard Law, the former arch bishop of Boston, who when it was suggested he may have covered up the raping of kids, not only did you not disavow yourself of him and let him face a court of law, you promoted the motherfucker and moved him to Rome.  Oh but wait, it wasn't a promotion because he isn't an employee, I forgot.  Yeah, this just has Asshat written all over it.

Catholic church's plea could rule out damages for priests' abuse

Victims' lawyers condemn 'scandalous' defence that Catholic priests are not legally employees of the church

• Jamie Doward
• The Observer, Sunday 24 July 2011

The Irish president, Mary McAleese, has reminded the church of its ‘stated objective of putting children first’. Photograph: Paul Faith/PA

Victims of sexual abuse by priests will no longer be able to sue the Catholic church for damages if a landmark judgment rules that priests should not be considered as employees.

In a little publicised case heard this month at the high court, the church claimed that it is not "vicariously liable" for priests' actions. The church has employed the argument in the past but this was the first time it had been used in open court and a ruling in the church's favour would set a legal precedent.

The use of the defence raises further questions about the church's willingness to accept culpability for abuse. It follows a damning report into abuse at the diocese of Cloyne in Ireland which prompted the Irish president, Mary McAleese, to call on leaders of the church "to urgently reflect on how, by coherent and effective action, it can restore public trust and confidence in its stated objective of putting children first".

Those planning to bring claims in relation to the high court case expressed dismay. "As children, we weren't given an innocent, carefree and safe environment," said one. "We weren't given a peaceful structure in which to grow and develop normally. By some miracle, some of us are still here to voice the words of so many who can't. Only a small number of victims ever come forward. The full potential of who we could have been as adults has been stolen."

The church's defence has been condemned by lawyers. "I think the Catholic church's attempt to avoid responsibility for the abhorrent actions of one of its priests is nothing short of scandalous," said Richard Scorer of the law firm Pannone, which specialises in abuse cases. "The Catholic church would be better served by facing up to its responsibilities rather than trying to hide behind spurious employment law arguments."

The ruling is being made as part of a preliminary hearing into the case of "JGE", who claims to have been sexually abused while a six-year-old resident at The Firs, a children's home in Portsmouth run by an order of nuns, the English Province of Our Lady of Charity. "If we fail, it would mean that no other victims of Catholic priests would be able to be compensated," said Tracey Emmott of Emmott Snell, a specialist in working with sexual abuse claims who is representing JGE.

JGE alleges that she was sexually abused by Father Wilfred Baldwin, a priest of the Roman Catholic diocese of Portsmouth and its "vocations director", who regularly visited The Firs during the 70s. Her legal team claim the nuns were negligent and in breach of duty, and that the diocese was liable for Baldwin's alleged abuse as he was a Catholic priest engaged within the work of the diocese.

Previous hearings in the House of Lords and the court of appeal relating to other church organisations have found that ministers should be treated as employees. But there has been no judgment yet on whether the relationship between a Catholic priest and his bishop is akin to an employment relationship.

"They claim that the relationship between the bishop of the diocese and the parish priest in question does not amount to anything akin to a relationship of employment, and therefore there cannot be any 'vicarious liability' for the priest's acts," Emmott said.

"That is to say, whatever sexual abuse their priests might commit, it is not their responsibility. They are absolved of blame. We need to show that, while Father Baldwin wasn't strictly an employee of the church, he was acting on the bishop's behalf and that the bishop clearly had a degree of control over his activities."

Criminal proceedings against Baldwin, who was the subject of a police investigation, concluded when he died of a heart attack in 2006.

Asshat - I'll take sex with the doctor for 200 calories, Alex

Can't sleep, so I thought I would dig this up, heard about it earlier and decided to get all Lenoard Nimoy-y so I could bring it to you, the fine reader of this page.  Our Asshat winner is Dr Arie Oren and no amount of health care legislation is going to be able to explain this....

ktla.com

Weight Loss Doctor Told Patients Sex With Him Would Burn Calories, cops say

KTLA News

11:57 AM PDT, April 11, 2011

CONSHOHCKEN, PA (KTLA) -- A weight loss doctor is accused of sexually assaulting female patients telling them it will help them burn calories.

Dr. Arie Oren is charged with aggravated indecent assault and indecent assault in connection with his alleged inappropriate touchings of at least six patients.

The assaults allegedly took place during weight loss sessions between September and December 2010, according to Montgomery County District Attorney Risa Vetri Ferman.

Oren told one patient, "If you have an orgasm, that would burn 200 calories," according to court documents.

Asshat - No laughing matter

I know sometimes when I take to doing an Asshat blog I will start by trying to be funny or witty or at least do a couple sentence diatribe on what is about to follow.  I can't do that this time, this isn't funny, it isn't cute and there is no suitable joke or rant I can make here.

Reno mother pleads guilty to fatally shaking, beating and burning infant son

A 30-year-old housekeeper admitted Thursday that she fatally abused her infant son through shaking, beating and severe burning, by inflicting injuries that dated back to when he was born 57 days earlier, authorities said.

Josela Posada pleaded guilty before Washoe District Judge Steven Elliott to the first-degree murder of her 8-week-old baby, Kristopher, who died Feb. 13, 2010. She was scheduled for a May 26 sentencing where she faces a term of life in prison. Immigration and Customs Enforcement officials have also placed a hold on the El Salvadorian woman whom they said is in the country illegally.

During a preliminary hearing, baby Kristopher’s father, Orlando Vasquez, testified that Posada referred to the infant as a gay slur and had never wanted the child. Vasquez and Reno police detectives testified Posada admitted to them she struck the baby when she was angered by his crying.

Posada has an older daughter who was 15-months old when Kristopher died after Posada said she had put him to sleep in his crib. Deputy District Attorney Elliott Sattler said the girl was healthy and well cared for, and that she is in the custody of relatives.

Vasquez testified he was trying to get custody of his son and that Posada wouldn’t let him see the boy.

At the time of the baby’s death, Posada had been working as a housekeeper for an apartment complex on Kuenzli Street, where she also lived with her children.

Sattler said when Posada discovered her baby had died, she waited 45 minutes before a friend called police. She also did not seek medical attention for the child.

He said an autopsy showed the underweight baby had injuries to his brain that were consistent with shaking, that both of his retinas were detached, and that he suffered several rib fractures, a broken femur, had whiplash, spinal cord injuries, and first and second-degree burns on his abdomen and groin area.

The autopsy also showed that the injuries dated from the time he was born until the day he died.

A teenage girl who babysat Kristopher testified that he was always screaming and shrieking as if he were in severe pain. Posada blamed the boy’s burn blisters on "diaper rash," the girl said.

Asshat - Out of the box

I actually heard about this at work today, it was mentioned on the radio and I needed to make all of my fellow readers aware.  What constitutes this particular Asshat you may ask?  How about using your vagina as a clown car for pharmaceuticals.  That is what wins it this week for Karin Mackaliunas.  My only question is what was the 22 cents for, in case she needed to make change perhaps?

 

Authorities in Pennsylvania arrested a 27-year-old woman who they say hid more than 100 items -- including 54 bags of heroin and loose change -- in her vagina.

Investigators took Karin Mackaliunas into custody last weekend after she was involved in a motor vehicle crash, according to police in Scranton. Officers in nearby Dunmore heard about the accident and, suspecting that she had been involved in the recent burglary of a local inn, asked Scranton police to detain Mackaliunas for questioning.

During a routine search, Scranton police Officer Nancy Baumann found three bags of heroin inside Mackaliunas' coat, records show. Baumann placed Mackaliunas in the back of the patrol car and was taking her to police headquarters when she noticed Mackaliunas fidgeting. The two women then got into a struggle, after which Mackaliunas asked to speak with another officer, whom she told she had "hidden more heroin in her vagina," according to the criminal complaint.

Investigators took Mackaliunas to Community Medical Center for further examination, police said. Doctors there retrieved "up 54 bags of heroin, 31 empty bags used to package heroin, 8.5 prescription pills and $51.22" during a cavity search, according to the criminal complaint.

Mackaliunas was jailed on $25,000 bail on charges of possession with intent to deliver a controlled substance, possession of drug paraphernalia and two counts of possession of a controlled substance, police said.

She is expected to appear in court for a preliminary hearing sometime today. It is not clear whether she has an attorney.

Asshat - My best shot

Guns can be used for many reasons.  Some people use them for sport, whether that be skeet shooting or hunting, others use them for protection and others still use them to commit crimes.  But one thing guns aren't good for is putting out fires.  This week's Asshat, Stephen Forthman, apparently didn't get the memo.

Man who doesn't dial 911 loses home to inferno

KEVIN SAYLOR, KEVIN SAYLOR
News Sentinel (Knoxville, Tennessee)
January 14, 2011

NORTH KNOXVILLE - Stephen Forthman shoots first and asks questions later. He wears a shirt proudly displaying the words "I don't dial 911" next to a picture of a hand gripping a sixshooter. When it comes time to contact local emergency services for assistance, he'd rather just shoot at the problem until it goes away - even when the problem is his own home being on fire.

No injuries were reported in a large structural house fire in North Knoxville at Forthman's residence on Whittle Springs Road yesterday.

Knoxville firefighters were alerted by neighbors at 2:15 p.m. of smoke at the residence, according to Knoxville Fire Department spokesman Capt.

John Nickleton. The Knoxville Fire Department responded to an initial report of heavy smoke coming from the garage, and of a large bearded man in the front yard screaming and shooting into the house.

"At first I didn't even notice the fire," said neighbor Tricia Perkinson. "I heard gunshots coming from across the street. When I looked outside, I saw Steve in his front yard waving a gun at the house. He was yelling obscenities and just shooting. He was saying, 'You better get out of here you bleeping bleep.' I thought he had lost his mind. Then I saw the smoke."

"When we arrived at the scene, the house was completely engulfed in flames," said firefighter Daniel Cummings. "Outside, the homeowner was shouting and firing a semiautomatic pistol into the fire."

Firefighters were able to contain the flames to the Forthman residence, but the massive fire gutted the two-story home. Police were called to restrain Forthman, who had to be disarmed and handcuffed before he would stop shooting at the blaze.

Fire investigators are expected to return to the scene today to determine the fire's cause.

This isn't the first time Forthman has refused to dial 911. In 2004, Forthman tried to shoot himself in the torso after having chest pains. His brother-in-law wrestled a rifle away from Forthman and called an ambulance.

Copyright 2011 ProQuest Information and LearningAll Rights ReservedProQuest SuperText

News Sentinel (Knoxville, Tennessee)

Asshat - Not Good Enough To Eat

A recipe for surefire success when it comes to finding an Asshat.  Take one part Catholic priest, let simmer for 40 years or so, add one part campaign to get said priest a Nobel Peace Prize and let settle and what do you have?  If you guessed a steaming pile of child rape you get a cookie.  As for Francois Houtart, he may not get the Nobel Prize, but he does get the first Asshat of 2011.



Francois Houtart, Belgian Activist Priest, Admits Sexual Abuse

GABRIELE STEINHAUSER

BRUSSELS — A Belgian priest has confessed to a child sex-abuse accusation that came to light during a campaign to nominate him for the Nobel Peace Prize for his work fighting globalization's impact on developing countries.

The confession was published in a Belgian newspaper Wednesday and confirmed by the organization the priest founded, deepening a sex-abuse scandal that has rocked the Catholic Church in the country. After a spate of accusations this year, the church in September published the harrowing accounts of more than 100 victims of clerical sex abuse, some as young as 2 when they were assaulted.

In October, after supporters of 85-year-old Francois Houtart began working to nominate him for the Nobel, a woman contacted the nonprofit organization he founded and said the priest had abused her brother 40 years ago, according to its director, Bernard Duterme.

Houtart resigned the next month from the board of Cetri, which publishes reports critical of developed nations' actions in the Third World, Duterme said.

Houtart told the newspaper Le Soir that he twice touched "the intimate parts" of his cousin, an incident he called "inconsiderate and irresponsible."

In her e-mail to Cetri and the committee to nominate Houtart for the Nobel Prize, the victim's sister also pointed to her testimony in the church's report, Duterme said.

There, she details the abuse of her brother, which she describes as "rape," by an unnamed priest.

She says the priest, who was a friend of her father, entered her brother's room twice "to rape him." "Before the third time, my brother went to tell his parents, who kept him in their room," she is quoted as saying in the report.

The priest isn't named in the report.

Houtart is in Ecuador and didn't immediately respond to phone calls and e-mail Wednesday, but he told Le Soir that he entered the boy's room, when he was staying with the boy's parents close to Liege, in eastern Belgium.

"Walking through the room of one of the family's boys, I effectively touched his intimate parts twice, which woke him up and frightened him," Houtart is quoted as saying.

The committee in November ended its campaign to nominate Houtart for the 2011 Nobel Prize, saying the priest had requested its termination because "his age and his personal projects would not allow him to fully assume the role requested in such circumstances."

In a statement, the committee said "thousands of people" in 74 countries had participated in the signature campaign, recognizing Houtart's role in the social justice and antiglobalization movement.

It has been a traumatic year for the Catholic Church in Belgium, beginning in April with the resignation of the Bishop of Bruges Roger Vangheluwe. Vangheluwe admitted to having sexually abused a nephew for years when he was a priest and a bishop.

In June, authorities seized hundreds of case files from a church and used power tools to open a prelate's crypt in Mechlin's St. Rumbold Cathedral, seeking evidence. The raid was condemned by the Vatican and later ruled excessive by a Belgian court.

However, the investigation into the abuse continued and in September the Catholic Church published an almost 200-page report detailing the testimonies of 124 victims of abuse by Catholic clergy over decades.

In the church's report, the victim's sister says her father went to talk to the priest about the incident a few days later and asked him to apologize, but the priest declined and "told my father that there wasn't anything more normal." Her father then cut off all contact with Houtart, the woman says.

In his letter to Le Soir, Houtart says he was "personally perturbed" by the incident, "since I was conscious of the contradiction it represented with my Christian faith and my function as a priest."

He says the boy's parents suggested he get in touch with a professor in Liege, who advised him to stay in the priesthood and concentrate on his work.

Francois Polet, a researcher at Cetri, said the organization decided not to go public with the reason for Houtart's resignation from the board at the victim's sister's request. He said the precise relationship between Houtart and the victim – whether he was a cousin, nephew, or more distant relative – wasn't clear.

"It was a big, big surprise and a big, big (disappointment)," Polet said of the revelation. "Directly for us it was very clear that we could not continue to have some kind of collaboration" with Houtart.

Asshat - Again urine for a treat

This might be the best Asshat thing I have seen in ages.  It literally has everything, a pregnant woman smoking, a man making threats with a bucket of pee,  and a shirt ripped open just for starters.  I just don't know who wins in this particular instance, but I now have a better understanding of why Fark has a Florida tag.

Husband threatens to throw urine at pregnant wife (ARREST REPORT)

November 12, 2010 9:12 PM

Daily News

DeFUNIAK SPRINGS — A man faces felony charges after a night of escalating battles with his pregnant wife, according to an arrest report from the Walton County Sheriff’s Office.

Gary O’Don Newell, 42, was charged with aggravated battery to a victim known to be pregnant. His wife of three years is 15 weeks pregnant. A deputy was sent to their Trout Drive home Wednesday at 1:43 a.m.

Earlier that night, Newell locked himself in his shed and threatened his wife when she tried to get him to come out. The woman pried the door open with a hammer and smoked her husband out by blowing cigarette smoke into the structure.

The fight escalated after the wife hid all of the vehicle keys in her pocket. When Newell exited the shed, he pushed his wife into the woods, held her down and threatened “to throw a bucket of urine on her” if she did not return the keys, the report said.

She got him to let go of her by saying she would go get the keys. Newell chased his wife around the home when he realized she had the keys on her. He wrestled her to the ground and ripped off her shirt to retrieve them.

Newell’s wife ran for help and flagged down a van. The unidentified man said he did not have a phone but would make the call at home.

The wife returned home and found Newell sitting in his car with her purse. When she tried to retrieve it, Newell pushed her to the pavement.

Newell said he had thrown her belongings into the creek behind their home. He starting walking to the creek with the purse but stopped when he heard his wife on the phone with dispatch.

Newell promised his wife he would not throw her purse in the creek and asked her to tell dispatch not to send anyone.

While being placed under arrest, Newell requested an ambulance because he said he could not breathe.

Once in the hospital, he told the staff that the deputy “manhandled” him; dragged him out of his bathroom; kicked him into his living room; threw him on the grass; and refused to call for an ambulance.

“He was complaining to the hospital staff that he could not breathe but during the whole time at the hospital he would have enough breath to curse the doctor and myself for ‘inadequate’ treatment,” wrote the deputy in Newell’s arrest report.

Newell requested a cardiologist but was cleared with good health. Newell said he would sue the WCSO and the doctor for abusing him.

Once at the jail, the deputy let Newell out of the patrol car.

“So how did you like my act?” Newell asked him. “Your ass is mine.”

Asshat - There are no words

I could go on a lengthy diatribe about why this week's winner is this week's winner, but the video does more than I could ever do with my vocabulary.  Enjoy!!!!

Asshat - Freedom of speech

I believe when I first saw this I posted it on my Facebook page at the "Passion of the Anti Christ", because while we live in a country where there are certain freedoms, such as speech, acting on them in such a vile manner may win you an Asshat award from time to time.  And of course you get bonus points if you have a hierarchy to your stupidity, such as I will burn down your house, but only after you blow me.  Good thing too, because if you burn down the house first, I doubt she is going to be in the mood.  Anyway, congrats Mel Gibson, this is your Asshat.

WORLD EXCLUSIVE: Mel Gibson's Racist Rant Caught On Tape - Tells Oksana She Would Get 'Raped By N***ers'

By Doug

Created 07/01/2010 - 12:58pm

In one of the most explosive, racist and vile outbursts by a celebrity ever caught on tape, Mel Gibson told the mother of his love child that the way she was dressed would get her "raped by a pack of n***ers," RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.

It's a shocking and blockbuster development in the couple's bitter legal battle, and Mel's disgusting words are on audio tape. His racist, misogynist statement is one of the secrets lurking in his war with his former girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva.

RadarOnline.com has heard the tape, which also includes Mel telling Oksana he will burn down her home.

Drunken Mel previously shocked the world with his anti-Semetic comments when busted for DUI. Now, the new racist outburst has taken the Oscar winner to an even deeper low.

His outburst came during a series of explosive arguments with Oksana, mother of his infant daughter Lucia. They have been battling in court, with documents under seal, for the past several weeks.

And there is more than one disgusting outburst from Mel. RadarOnline.com has listened to the hate-fuelled rants the Braveheart star unleashed during fights with Oksana as their relationship unraveled.

"You're an embarrassment to me," Mel tells her at one point.

"You look like a f***ing pig in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of n***ers, it will be your fault."

Mel's attorney told RadarOnline.com that he is no longer commenting on the case and said Mel's publicist is the only Mel official who will speak for him.

Mel's profane outbursts are littered with references to Oksana being a "whore" and "c**t".

In another tirade, Mel tells Oksana: "How dare you act like such a bitch when I have been so f**king nice."

He warns, "I am going to come and burn the f**king house down... but you will blow me first."

The emergence of the explicit tapes is a stunning development in the couple's bitter separation and court battle over custody of their young daughter.

RadarOnline.com first broke the story about how Mel, 54, and Oksana, 40, filed dueling restraining orders against each other under seal.

Published reports say Oksana is alleging Gibson punched her in the face twice during a fit of rage, giving her a concussion and knocking out two of her front teeth.

Gibson does not deny that they had a confrontation but has simply described it, through his lawyer, as a loud argument.

In a further outburst, Mel is heard telling her, "You're a bitch" to which Oksana insists, "I didn't do anything."

"Did so," Mel responds.

The tapes do not make it clear what the couple was arguing about.

But Mel tells Oksana, "Look what you did to me... look what you are... look what every part of you is... f**king fake... f**king fake.

"You are the most synthetic person... who the f*** are you?"

He also takes aim at Oksana's previous relationship with former James Bond star Timothy Dalton, with whom she has a 13-year-old son, Alexander.

A source close to the situation says Oksana claims she was forced to tape Mel after he made a series of death threats.

The source says she hopes the recordings will be admissible in any potential trial.

"Oksana's motivation for recording this was to show Mel how mean he was, and because she feared for her life," said the insider.

"She wanted to get evidence that he was dangerous and violent."

The source claims that Mel has heard two of the tapes.

Said the source, "Mel is doing everything he can to suppress this... they are the rantings of a mad man."

When cops arrested Mel in 2006 on suspicion of drunk driving, Mel barraged them with obscenities, tried to escape custody and spewed bizarre anti-Semitic remarks.

"F**king Jews... The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world," Mel said.

He also allegedly told a female officer, "What do you think you're looking at, sugar t*ts?"

The news sparked worldwide outrage and the Mad Max star later apologized.

Gibson has seven children with former wife Robyn, whom he split with in 2009 after 27 years of marriage.

Asshat - Walk it off (honorable mention)

Rarely do I offer honorable mentions when it comes to Asshat-dom, but this week I will make an exception.  Briefly allow me to set the scene in the upcoming video, the Seattle Mariners and Anaheim Angels are tied 1-1 in the bottom of the 10th inning, with the Angels having runners on first and second.  The first batter in the video reaches base on an error, loading the bases for Kendry Morales.  On the first pitch he sees, Morales tags the ball, launching it for a game winning grand slam and a 5-1 Angels win.  That is not Asshat worthy, what is is what happens when Morales, after rounding the bases, leaps in the air to stomp on home plate.  He breaks his leg on the maneuver and will be out 10-12 weeks.  By all means, we have some video

 

 

Asshat - Possession is not 9/10th of the law

Back for another Asshat entry, we take ourselves to the lovely state of California for today's rather grisly proceedings and our newest winner Jarrod Wyatt.  As for what would make Jarrod our most recent Asshat winner, read on, but only if you are not reading on a full stomach.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1282647/American-cage-fighter-rips-beating-heart-training-partner-fearing-possessed-devil.html?printingPage=true

WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT

Arrested: Jarrod Wyatt was allegedly found standing naked over his dead friend's body in a room bathed in blood

A U.S. cage fighter ripped out the heart of his training partner while he was still alive after becoming convinced he was possessed by the devil, it was alleged today.

Jarrod Wyatt also cut out Taylor Powell's tongue and ripped off most of his face in a brutal assault that police said looked like a scene from a horror film, officers said.

They claim they found the 26-year-old standing naked over his friend's body with parts, including an eyeball, strewn around the blood splattered room in Klamath, California.

Wyatt allegedly told police he had drunk a cup of tea spiked with hallucinogenic mushrooms and became convinced Powell was possessed.

According to an autopsy Powell, 21, bled to death after his heart was ripped out.

The coroner said Powell had been alive when the organ was ripped out after his chest had been sliced open with a knife.

Wyatt told the police he thrown the heart into a fire along with other organs that he had removed from the body, it was claimed.

He allegedly told investigators he cooked the body parts because he was fearful Powell was still alive and he ‘needed to stop the Devil’.

Police had been called to the grisly scene after a third friend had witnessed a sudden mood change in Wyatt after they had all ingested wild mushroom tea.

Justin Davis told police he returned to the flat to find Wyatt naked and covered from head to toe in blood.

He noticed an eyeball lying in the middle of the floor and saw Powell's mutilated body.

A lawyer representing Wyatt has claimed the wild mushrooms caused him to act in such a violent way and had not control over his actions.

‘My client was trying to silence the devil,’ said James Fallman.

‘I think he was having a psychotic fit based on the mushrooms he had.’  

Wyatt has been charged with first degree murder and torture.

Prosecutors added the torture charge as Powell was still alive when his heart was removed.

Asshat - United we fall

Well since I have been on an almost blogging kick these last few days no need to stop now, not when there is such an easy target out there, this week's Asshat winner, the United Nations, which selected as a member to its Commission on the Status of Women the nation of Iran, which believes that stonings and lashings of women are pretty cool, especially if they do something really crazy, like get a sun tan or something.  Apparently you can beat them (women) and then join them (United Nations).  I think I will go back to having my head in the sand now.

Asshat - Holy

Normally I will pick Asshats with their ass firmly intact, but that isn't the case today and this week's winner, Officer Bryan Mallin.  Read on, oh lovers of ye olde Asshat....

chicagotribune.com

Off-duty UIC cop accidentally shoots himself in store

Cop under investigation after Vernon Hills incident

By Carolyn Rusin and Jodi S. Cohen, Chicago Tribune

March 24, 2010

A police officer for the University of Illinois at Chicago is under investigation after his gun accidentally discharged, wounding him in the buttocks while he shopped at a Vernon Hills shopping center, officials said Tuesday.

Police are looking into whether Officer Bryan Mallin may have violated department policy, though officers are allowed to carry guns off-duty, said Bill Burton, a university spokesman.

UIC officers can carry weapons off-duty because "they are sworn officers with statewide statutory power," Burton said.

Mallin, 39, was shopping at a Best Buy store in Rivertree Court Shopping Center around 5:30 p.m. Monday when the .40-caliber gun tucked in his waistband went off, said Sgt. Kevin Grampo of the Vernon Hills Police Department.

The weapon discharged when either his finger or clothing got "hooked" in the trigger, Grampo said.

Vernon Hills police, he said, do not expect charges against Mallin, who was taken to Advocate Condell Medical Center in Libertyville, where he was treated and released.

"We feel it was a true accident," Grampo said, who cited federal law that allows off-duty officers to carry weapons.

Burton declined to discuss the university's policy for officers who carry weapons off-duty, specifically whether it requires guns to be in holsters instead of waistbands.

"I am not able to get into that level of detail while the investigation is ongoing," he said, adding that officers get training in weapon safety.

Mallin has been an officer for UIC police for five years. He is on medical leave while police investigate the incident, Burton said.

Every law enforcement agency has its own internal policies for carrying weapons off-duty, said Chief Ronald Swan of the Illinois State University police. "We don't require them to carry them, but they can if they wish," he said.

Some rules require a gun to be concealed, and if an officer is going to consume alcohol, the gun must be left behind.

"It doesn't make any difference if the officer is carrying it on his ankle, his shoulder, his belt … it must be concealed," the chief said. "We also expect a level of professionalism if they are going to carry it. Discretion plays a big part of the role."

Carolyn Rusin is a freelance reporter; Jodi S. Cohen is a Tribune staff reporter.

jscohen@tribune.com

Copyright © 2010, Chicago Tribune

Asshat - More than names

Ricky Smyrnes, 23, Robert Masters Jr., 36, Melvin Knight, 20, Peggy Miller, 27, Amber Meidinger, 20; and Angela Marinucci, 17

 

I could stop right there, really I am loathe to mention anything beyond their names when it comes to handing out this week's Asshat(s).  If anything, their very existence is proof enough for me that evil exists, that some poeple are just not good and no amount of empathizing or excuse making is going to make me change my mind.  Some times there is a simple black and white, good and bad.  And this is bad, very bad.  Sadly all I can do is hand out Asshats here, because the death penalty is above my pay grade, and make no mistake I would have no problem seeing any of these people executed.  As for what they did, well here you go.

 

6 charged in woman's brutal killing

Police say mentally disabled victim was abused for days before stabbing

Saturday, February 13, 2010

By Sadie Gurman, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

Darrell Sapp/Post-Gazette

Joy Burkholder, with her husband, Lance, talks about her sister, Jennifer Daugherty. Police say Ms. Daugherty was stabbed repeatedly in a second-floor Greensburg apartment.

The upstairs neighbors would often yell and fight, but Wednesday night seemed worse.

"I heard a girl scream, like someone was beating her, body-slamming her on the floor," said Floria Headen, who lives below.

More disturbing, she said, was the eerie quiet that followed.

The silence followed a frenzy of beating, bizarre abuse and the stabbing of a young woman that ended in her death "right above our heads."

Jennifer Daugherty

Police said Jennifer Daugherty, 30, of Mount Pleasant, had been held against her will inside the Greensburg apartment at 428 N. Pennsylvania Avenue, since Tuesday by six people she believed were her friends.

Orchestrated by a ringleader, police said, the group beat Ms. Daugherty with their hands and feet, then struck her with a towel rack, a crutch and a vacuum cleaner hose. They bound her with Christmas decorations, shaved her hair, and painted her face with nail polish. They fed her vegetable oil, spices, detergent, medications and urine, according to police, and fatally stabbed her, carting her body a half-mile to Greensburg Salem Middle School in a neighbor's garbage can.

The group forced Ms. Daugherty to write a fake suicide note, which police found among her belongings and items that had been used to clean up her blood.

Charged with homicide, kidnapping, aggravated assault and conspiracy were Ricky Smyrnes, 23, Robert Masters Jr., 36, Melvin Knight, 20, Peggy Miller, 27, Amber Meidinger, 20; and Angela Marinucci, 17, all of Greensburg. Ms. Daugherty was acquainted with all of her assailants, police said, but had "some relationship" with Mr. Smyrnes, a man with court records that indicate an abusive past.

Ms. Daugherty's relatives said she had a mental disability that made her especially friendly and trusting. Her social life and appointments often brought her to Greensburg, police said, and she went willingly to the apartment. Her stepfather, Robert Murphy, told officers he took her to the County Market in Mount Pleasant on Monday to catch a bus to Greensburg. She brought a small duffel bag with a few pairs of jeans and some shirts. It was the last time her family saw her alive.

Police wouldn't comment on a motive for the slaying. Although toxicology tests are not complete, they said there were no obvious signs of drinking or drug use.

"She was exploited," said Ms. Daugherty's older sister, Joy Burkholder. "Her kindness and her handicap made her very, very vulnerable. She trusted anybody. If you met her today she would be your best friend for life."

Relatives recognized some of the suspects' names, but Ms. Burkholder said her sister "was very secretive about her Greensburg life."

Some of the suspects played a larger part in the crime than others, Greensburg police Chief Walter Lyons said, though officials declined to elaborate on their roles. Mr. Knight told police he stabbed Ms. Daugherty in the chest, side and neck, according to a criminal complaint. He and Mr. Smyrnes carried the handled garbage can to the middle school parking lot, where a truck driver found it Thursday. The suspects cooperated with investigators and implicated each other, according to the complaints.

Though police said Ms. Daugherty likely did not leave the apartment from Tuesday to Thursday, it was unknown exactly when she arrived there. At 6:16 p.m. Tuesday, police said they responded to a fight involving another roommate who was moving out. Officers talked to Mr. Smyrnes and Mr. Knight but made no contact with Ms. Daugherty, nor was there evidence to suggest she was there.

Bill Miller, who owns the property and described it as a revolving door of colorful renters, said one of the female suspects called him early Wednesday morning, concerned that a roommate, Robert Cathcart, was stealing their stuff while moving out. On a voice mail message, she told Mr. Miller she didn't want to call the police because she "did not want to cause trouble."

Mr. Miller said he received a call from Mr. Smyrnes Thursday. Mr. Miller, who had not learned of the slaying until contacted by a reporter at his home Friday, said he returned Mr. Smyrnes' call Thursday evening and learned police were at the apartment. He did not go there because he figured the roommates were having a domestic dispute and did not want to step into a fight.

Robert Masters Jr.

Ricky V. Smyrnes

Melvin Knight

Amber C. Meidinger

Peggy D. Miller

Angela Marinucci

He said the only two people officially on the lease were Mr. Cathcart and another man who was not charged in the killing. Neighbors frequently called to complain about their fights. He would tell them to call police, who confirmed that they had been to the house. Ms. Headen said at one point she was calling police "every other day." She called Tuesday, but said "nothing happened," so she opted not to call Wednesday.

On a recent trip, Mr. Miller found the apartment without much furniture, as if people were "all laying on the floor. It was like an old hippie den."

Mr. Cathcart, 19, knew Mr. Smyrnes and considered Ms. Daugherty a best friend. The two met about seven months ago at Threshold Inc., a mental health, drug and alcohol treatment center, according to Carol Pedder, 40, of Greensburg.

Staff at Threshold referred callers to Westmoreland County's mental health/mental retardation program. Its administrator, Kathleen A. Wohlgemuth, said she could not comment because of confidentiality.

Ms. Pedder said Ms. Daugherty considered Ms. Marinucci and Ms. Miller friends, but they did not feel the same.

During a telephone interview, Ms. Pedder served as an intermediary with Mr. Cathcart, who stood near her and furnished answers while she spoke with a reporter.

Ms. Pedder, who knows Mr. Cathcart through her son, said she took him in after Mr. Smyrnes and the other suspects forced him from his house.

"Rob let Ricky stay there for a few days, and he took over and kicked Rob out," Ms. Pedder said.

Several of the defendants have been arrested in the past, but Mr. Smyrnes' record is the most extensive. Police had already issued a warrant for his arrest at the time of the killing, court records show, for possessing instruments of crime on Jan. 30. He has a pending assault case in Allegheny County, and court records show he had at least four cases in Westmoreland County. He pleaded guilty in the past to charges including assault, harassment, theft and conspiracy.

Several women, including his wife and his mother, asked for protection from abuse orders against Mr. Smyrnes, writing in court filings that he beat and threatened to kill them.

His wife, Karena Smyrnes, told police in October that he assaulted her after arguing over sex at their home in McKeesport. He went to jail after the incident and continued to contact his wife, despite the protection order, said her aunt, Treasure Martinez. The pair have an infant son, Manny, and Ms. Martinez said Mrs. Smyrnes wants a divorce.

She said Mr. Smyrnes has been out of jail only about two weeks.

Ms. Daugherty's relatives did not know the nature of her relationship with Mr. Smyrnes. Her sister said she enjoyed wrestling, singing and dancing and "believed everyone was good, and no one would hurt her."

On her MySpace profile, Ms. Daugherty speaks lovingly of her mother and stepfather, calls herself a "country girl" and said she was in trade school for mechanics. She says she has "good friends that I can go to for advice" and knows how to make people laugh.

Sadie Gurman: sgurman@post-gazette.com or 412-263-1878. Staff writers Jonathan D. Silver and Joe Smydo contributed.

Read more: http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/10044/1035680-56.stm#ixzz0gEHlKfa7

 

Asshat - The update edition

Two weeks ago I handed the Asshat award to our mayor for his lack of response to the snowstorm that all but shiut down the city and the subsequent tepid response to actually clearing streets to get the city functional again.  While some I am sure would deem my words to just griping, the stakes have just been raised a tad.  Now we find that someone has died and why may you ask?  Because the ambulance couldn't get there.  And why couldn't the ambulance get there?  Because the streets weren't cleared.  10 calls to 911 and the result is a man sits in his home suffering in pain until he dies.  Inexcusable.

Hazelwood man dies after 10 911 calls over 2 days

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

By Sadie Gurman, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

In his first call to 911, Curtis Mitchell sounded calm, explaining to dispatchers that his "entire stomach [was] in pain."

By the time his longtime girlfriend made a 10th call nearly 30 hours later, she was frantic. He wasn't breathing. He was cold to the touch.

"Oh God, oh God," Sharon Edge sobbed to dispatchers. "I've been trying to get an ambulance over here for three days."

Paramedics arrived at their Hazelwood home as Ms. Edge tried to resuscitate the 50-year-old, but it was too late.

"I sat up here with him, watching him die," Ms. Edge said Tuesday, after city officials apologized to her and pledged immediate changes in emergency response after Mr. Mitchell's death on Feb. 7. "They didn't do their jobs like they were supposed to."

Snow-covered roads, poor communication and a 911 center deluged with more than double the average number of calls during last week's crippling snowstorms combined to cause Mr. Mitchell's long wait, city officials said.

Ambulances were dispatched three times on Saturday, Feb. 6, to the couple's home in the 5100 block of narrow Chaplain Way, but couldn't get there because of the snow. Paramedics twice asked whether Mr. Mitchell could walk to an intersection, even after he told them that he could not because he was in too much pain.

Emergency vehicles were within blocks of his home three times -- once so close Ms. Edge could see the ambulance lights from her porch -- but did not make contact with him. They finally reached the home on Sunday morning, Feb. 7, but Mr. Mitchell was already dead.

"We should have gotten there," Public Safety Director Michael Huss said. "It's that simple."

Complicating matters, communication problems meant that each call was seen as an individual request for help. Information gained on previous calls was not passed down during the next request, said Ron Roth, medical director for the city's public safety department and Allegheny County's emergency operations center.

"As a result, we made the same request over and over," he said.

Dispatchers sent the first ambulance to Mr. Mitchell's home just after 2 a.m. on Feb. 6, after he called complaining of abdominal pain, according to dispatch records. The call was graded E-2, or less pressing, as his symptoms were deemed not life-threatening. He called 911 again two hours later, asking what the hold-up was.

The call-taker told him medics were on their way, but the ambulance got stuck in the snow near the Elizabeth Street Bridge. The call was canceled after paramedics learned that Mr. Mitchell was in too much pain to walk out to them. Mr. Mitchell said he would try again later.

A second request for help was made about an hour after the first was canceled, though medics were not aware that an ambulance had gotten stuck while en route the house earlier. They, too, became stuck, according to Dr. Roth's report.

"If he wants a ride to the hospital, he is just going to have to come down to the truck," a medic told the dispatcher. Mr. Mitchell said he would try to walk to the truck, but later told them he couldn't make it across the bridge. The second call was canceled.

The third call for an ambulance came nearly five hours later, at 11:17 a.m. Saturday. Mr. Mitchell reported similar abdominal pain, and officials identified "no priority symptoms," and the call was held because of limited availability, Dr. Roth wrote in his report.

"At this point in time, higher priority calls are being held, there are over 30 calls in the pending queue," he wrote.

At about 8:15 p.m. Saturday, nine hours later, the call was upgraded to E-1, or higher priority, because Ms. Edge, who had begun making the calls on Mr. Mitchell's behalf, told call-takers he was short of breath and that they'd been waiting all day.

Less than an hour later, Ms. Edge called again to tell dispatchers that her boyfriend took sleeping and pain pills and she "could not get him up."

A doctor who called Ms. Edge back was "convinced he took his prescribed medications and went to sleep," Dr. Roth said, and the call was canceled.

In the final call, about 8 a.m. Sunday, she screamed for help. The call was graded E-0 -- a top priority. But when paramedics arrived, Mr. Mitchell had already died.

The cause of death is pending toxicology test results, the medical examiner's office said. Dr. Roth wrote that Mr. Mitchell had a history of pancreatitis, though his reported symptoms were not exclusive to that disease.

"It's unacceptable what happened," Mayor Luke Ravenstahl said. "It needs to change. We're talking about somebody who lost their life, and it's no small matter."

The city planned today to start dispatching firefighters as first responders on medical calls of the two highest grades of severity, and on calls of the third highest level that remained unanswered for more than 30 minutes. Firefighters are currently only called as first responders to the most severe incidents.

Sadie Gurman: sgurman@post-gazette.com or 412-263-1878.

Asshat - Today it is the Fox and the hound

Ever one to have people do the hard work of Asshat-ary for me, it is nice when people step up and broadcast it for millions to see, which brings us to the "Today" show.  While gearing up for NBC's coverage of the Olympic games, the "Today" crew are all gathered around wondering just who it will be that will light the Olympic torch for the Vancouver Games.  Merideth Viera chimes in that maybe it will be Betty Fox whose son, Michael Fox,  died of cancer.  Except, of course, that he didn't.  Michael J Fox is very much alive and is an avid spokesperson for Parkinson's research, a disease with which he suffers.  More likely is that Miss Viera is referring to Terry Fox,  who did die from cancer.  Most notable of Terry's achievements was his "Marathon for Hope", a cross Canada run which Terry did with one prosthetic leg to raise money and awareness for cancer research.  Every September now many places have a Terry Fox Run in honor of his effort, and it has become the world's largest one day fundraiser for cancer research.

Bad enough that Miss Viera would confuse the two Foxes, but worse was that the production guys back in the truck followed suit, first by posting a picture of Terry Fox and then following it up with one of Michael J Fox, because apparently they didn't know which one was alive or dead as well, so it was best to post both pictures.  In any event the combined efforts of the "Today" shows on air and production talents, or lack thereof, win this week's coveted Asshat crown.  And for some video evidence, let's go to the tape.

 

Asshat - Snowed over

I will not revisit the snow of Friday/Saturday, where the forecasters called for 4 to 8 inches and we got 2 feet, or the subsequent Snowmaggedon we were supposed to receive this week but of the 4-12 inches we saw maybe 2 to 3, save for one asshat, which will go to the mayor of the city of Pittsburgh, Luke Ravenstahl.  If I neede a reminder of why he wins it this week, consider that a week after the big snowfall I just walked to the laundrymat and the three streets I take (McKee Place to Zulema Street, Zulema Street to Welsford Street, Welsford Street to laundrymat) have yet to be touched by city services, the only tracks through them are the ruts created by cars trying to get through.  Even as I was coming back in from said laundrymat someone was stuck outside my apartment.  Public transit is still running delays, heck 10 bus routes are still completely out of operation and others are still running detoured routes because of the lack of street cleaning and that falls on the shoulders of the mayor.  For his lack of preparedness and subsequent slow to non moving cleanup he wins this wek's Asshat award.

Deliverance

Let's just get the discalimer out of the way right now, this is going to be a long blog entry. Not like I really had to say that, by now anyone that has frequented the page knows that I have a tendency to ramble on and on and on and on. See, I just used four ons where obviously two would have sufficed. Anyway lots of ground to cover here so it's best to get cracking already.

I will not say I am a fan of the US Postal service, but going to the mailbox has certainly been more enjoyable these last few days. It all started last Saturday when I opened my mailbox to find my first delivery from WalMart.com in the box. As I mentioned before, I used part of the gift card I received for Christmas and went on the WalMart website to do some shopping, rather than braving the elements to actually shop in the store. I picked out two items, a fleece Starter jacket and Iron Man on DVD. Well, apparently WalMart.com doesn't ship orders in their entirity, maybe the objects were found in different locations, I am not sure, but the DVD and the jacket came on two different days. Saturday was DVD day, which is fine with me, I needed something to break the monotany of bad television that seems to run rampant on the networks these days and DVDs work as well as anything in doing just that. I also got a phone call from Rich, who asked if I would be interested in shooting some pool on Sunday afternoon. That is an easy answer, yes, yes and yes. Again, three yesses where one would have been fine. So my plans for Sunday were set.

For those that don't kknow who Rich is, take a look back at the Asshat thread on Pat Robertson, he is the one doing most of the arguing with me. That is cool, if there is one thing I learned after doing talk radio for 12+ years it is that you don't value friendships based on the opinions on any one particular issue. I would argue it is one of the few successes to my blog page. Had it been based solely on ideological grounds, then the fact I am a Democrat, albeit a socially liberal, fiscally conservative one, a large swath of my acquaintances here would have left many moons ago, because I know a significant number do not come from the same political leanings as moi. Which to me is cool because I get to learn from them through their own blog entries and hopefully they get to learn through mine. Lesson one to be learned here is obviously don't say in one or two words what you can say in ten or twenty.

Before I trudge forward and while I am still on a semi political bent, I might as well hand out an Asshat award. This one is kind of close to me, because way back in the day I was a supporter of his, so I have to admit I was wrong and not in a small way. You guessed it, my Asshat this week is Senator John Edwards. Back in 2004 when George Bush won his second term as President over John Kerry, I was a supporter of Edwards during the Democratic primary race. I thought, correctly I might add, that despite the negatives that Bush was carrying in that race, John Kerry just didn't have the "it" factor that would make him a compelling candidate for office. Not that Edwards would have beat Bush either, that race never happened so I will not assume one way or the other how it might or might not have turned out, but Senator Kerry just came off to me as too aloof to connect with the American public. His idea that the Swift Boat campaign wouldn't harm him (it did, regardless of its actual accuracy regarding Kerry's service record) and his inability to connect with the general populace during campaign stops (note to future candidates stumping in Pennsylvania for votes, do not put Swiss cheese on a Philly cheesesteak), Kerry just didn't have that "oomph" factor that would compel people to vote for him.

Okay, I am getting sidetracked here. Back to the Asshat at hand. Anyway in 2008 Edwards again sought the Democratic nomination, and silly old me said on the air that I thought he would win it. To be fair to my political ignorance, I also thought Guliani would win the Republican nomination, neither of which happened, instead they both dropped out of the race on the same day. I would like to say that I am the political kiss of death, but factors far beyond my prognosticating came into play into both of their demises. During the early days of the Democratic primaries I would sit in the radio studio working on the Lynn Cullen Show. She also being a Democrat meant that a large quantity of our callers were of the left of the aisle variety and during the primary it was amazing to watch to what lengths supporters of one candidate would go to savage another candidate from their own party. I tended to stay middle of the road, save for suggesting Edwards would win, because by and large I liked most of the field of entrants for the Democratic party in that race. At the time I viewed it as a abundance of riches and would have been happy voting for most of them in a Presidential election (save for Gravel and Kucinich, who were at best comic relief and at worst nutbags). But as the savaging began I mentioned that there is plenty in the whisper stream that could savage any of the candidates, my own pick, Edwards, included where it was in the very early stages but there was murmuring out there that he had an affair. After Edwards fell out of the race, those whipserings became substantiated, Edwards did indeed have an affair with Rielle Hunter, a videographer that was part of the campaign. It was a blessing in disguise for Democrats, had Edwards actually won the nomination, or even been selected as the Vice Presidential candidate, the idea of a man cheating on his wife, Elizabeth Edwards, who has incurable breast cancer, running for one of the highest offices in the land, would surely have been a body blow to the campaign.

Surely by now you would like me to shut up, after all, what do the comings and goings of what happened years ago have to do with this week's Asshat. I am sure some of you know, but for those that don't (or even if you do), read on. During the affair, Reille Hunter would give birth to a baby girl, a girl that Edwards said couldn't be his because the timing was all wrong. He even said that he would be willing to take a paternity test to prove he wasn't the father. The name of the father on the birth certificate was, in fact, a man by the name of Andrew Young, who was serving as an aide to the Senator at the time. While that reeks of improbability, it didn't reek of impossibility. Some people are attracted to that political power set, so maybe Young and Edwards did in fact sleep with the same woman.

Of course we now know that that isn't the case. Whether it be because Young is about to come out with a tell all book about the Edwards campaign, including how he signed the birth certificate in order to save Edwards political embarassment and was asked to procure a used diaper to test the baby's DNA, or the current best seller "Game Change" which savages a number of the campaigns in the 2008 race, Edwards's included, the real story behind Reille Hunter's baby was going to come out. And so it did this past week, with Senator Edwards finally admitting that he is in fact the father, after denying paternity of the baby for the first two years of her life. Then to make matters better or worse, Edwards hops a plane to help with the efforts in Haiti. The noble minded would suggest he did this to help out in time of tragedy, the more cynical minded, myself included, would say he is using the tragedy to avoid answering questions about why he denied his daughter for the last two years. Whether either of those notions is correct, the underlying fact is that Edwards first lied about the affair, then lied about the paternity of his own daughter and for that he wins this week's Asshat award.

See what I mean, why use two words when you can use twenty, or in this case, much more. I could simply have said "Edwards lied" but what fun would that have been? Far better to draw the whole thing out and make you ask yourself "Why the hell am I sitting through all of this?"

Now where were we in our story. Oh yes, the opportunity to shoot pool. Rich and I are fairly evenly matched when it comes to pool, so it is fun to shoot him because I never know how it is going to turn out, Sure we talk a little smack back and forth, but unlike some of the people in the bar, who consistently kick my ass, I never really have a feel for how a match between Rich and myself will turn out. Sunday was no different, as after 15 games Rich had a lead, 8 games to 7, when we finally decided to call it a day. I walked back to his place with him so I could do some visiting, it is always nice to get out of the apartment once in a while, so I hung out and chatted with his family for a bit and made my way back home, though not with my tail between my legs, as I am sure Rich would have liked (just seeing if you are paying attention Rich).

Anyway Monday comes along and again I find joy in the mail. First at work, where I have been jokingly putting together an "Employee Lounge". See, we have a decent amount of room in our basement, but it wasn't always the case, as lots of stuff that can best be classified as junk littered the basement. Before Ed left for Florida, we actually had a guy come along with a truck and haul three truck loads of just junk out of the basement, things that we would never use and were far to big to be disposed of via a normal trash pickup. Unused shelves and displays all found their way into the back of the truck, clearing up a decent amount of room, but not enough to create a lounge as it were. One section of the basement was these large plastic totes, each one full of old porn magazines (yes, we sell those, it is a newstand after all, and what could be newsier than tits and ass). We are talking magazines that are 10 to 12 years old at least. Ed wanted to sell them at a discounted rate, three mags for $3.99. Since most of them were still in their original plastic it didn't seem like a half bad idea, so we went about starting the process of taking the books, putting them three to a bag and then putting them on the floor as needed. It is a process that is still in the works, we had that many books. It would not be beyond belief to say that we had at least 50 totes of these books. So we started the process and an amazing thing happened, some of the books sold and we were able to pack up more and put them out. All told we have probably moved 20 or so totes of porn to this point, which creates a significant amount of space in the basement. So much so that when John, one of our managers, got himself a new office chair because his old one was missing a wheel, I took the chair, removed all of the wheels so it would be semi level at least, and placed it in the area where the porn mags used to be and declared that it was now officially the employee lounge. Nothing more than a joke by me, but the joke caught on and now as we clear out more totes of porn and more space becomes available the "employee lounge" is starting to grow.

Enter Muscle Milk. This is a beverage for those body builder types, certainly I wouldn't drink it, the idea of a "milk" beverage that doesn't need to be refridgerated when stored strikes me as yucky. But we sell it, not in great numbers, but decent numbers. It comes from our Pepsi supplier and during one of his visits to the store he mentioned that there was a giveaway. Apparently Muscle Milk was giving away stuff to those stores that purchased a set number of cases of the product, starting in the beginning of September and running till just before Christmas. The prize tiers were in groups of 10, three prizes to choose from if you bought ten cases, three to choose from at 20, and three to choose from at 30. The prizes went from a windbreaker (10 cases) all the way to a 4 GB video MP3 player (30 cases). While I knew enough about our sales to know we would never get a 30 case prize, there was a good chance we could get to the twenty case level and I was convinced we could at least get to the ten case level. As the promotion drew to a close, we had enough to get to the twenty case level if we wanted it, but at the ten case level was a directors chair and thoughts of the employee lounge again danced in my head, so I filled out the appropriate paperwork and xeroxed the necessary invoices and sent out for the second piece of lounge furiniture. Sure enough on Monday it arrived.

Also on Monday I came home and the second half of my WalMart.com order came in, the fleece jacket. It is a little brightish on the blue side, but it is actually pretty warm, comfy enough that when the temps are in the 30s or so I can wear it and not be freezing my ass off. If it gets colder then I can always go back to a heavier coat, but this fills a nice springtime need, and springtime is just around the corner for those not paying attention.

Tuesday the mailbox and the inbox was filled with goodies as well. In the mailbox I had a couple of things I signed up for on the internet. One was 10 $1 off coupons for Marlboros. I realize this isn't everyone's idea of a good thing, but to a smoker who prefers Marlboro Lights but has been going the Pall Mall route because of the increased taxes on smokes, coupons are a good thing. Pall Malls are still cheaper, but this at least puts the Marlboros in play now, where as before they would be as much as $2 a pack more. Over the course of a week, since I smoke one pack a day, that works out to $14-$15 just to upgrade, or $728-$780 a year. That is a month and a half of rent right there kids. Also in the mail was an assortment of Nescafe flavored instant coffees. I think I signed up for this on Facebook, I am really not sure, but there were packets for 6 different instant coffees in there. I tried one, wasn't all that impressed, I will not be giving up brewed coffee anytime soon, but free is free, so who am I to complain. When I logged onto the computer I found that my code for my most recent $5 Amazon gift card had arrived, making that 6 gift cards I have gotten so far. That is $30 free dollars to spend, not including the change I had redeemed at Coinstar for use on Amazon.com. Even with me purchasing a book I still have over $30 on the site to play with and I am getting very close to being able to add another gift card to the tally.

Wednesday was hoagie day. My cousin Sarah was selling hoagies to help her school fund a band trip to Florida. I found out about this through my aunt, who posted something on Facebook and I said I would purchase a couple sammiches (as the locals sometimes say). Of course picking them up could be a problem, they live in Natrona Heights, which is on the outskirts of Pittsburgh. City buses do go to that area, but I wasn't sure exactly where they lived, so I didn't know where I would be getting off of the bus and how far I would have to walk. After a few messages back and forth with Amy (my aunt) and a little hopscotching between the Port Authority website and Mapquest, I had devised a plan that would get me there. The bus would leave me off about 8 blocks from their house, and better yet, it would be an express bus, which would cut down travel time somewhat. For those not in the know, there are basically two types of buses in Pittsburgh, there are your city buses that run fairly regularly but make a ton of stops along the way. Then there are express buses, those tend to run to the suburbs during the rush hours, in the morning they will run into town, stop running during the afternoon, then as the work day ends, they run back out of town. The express buses tend to not have as many stops in the city, maybe some stops downtown, but then will not stop (save for a couple of stops on the busway) until they are outside the city proper. As I was looking at the schedules I saw that I could take one of two buses, I could take a 1A New Kensington, which is a city bus, which means it runs more frequently but would be making a ton of stops. The estimated time of that route would be about an hour and 25 minutes. Or I could hop an AV (Allegheny Flyer) which would take about an hour and 5 minutes. As an added bonus, since I get off of work at 3pm, I could catch the first AV bus downtown in about 30 minutes, if I could manage the length of Smithfield Street in that time.

Time out here kids, something very, very, very (three verys where I could have used one) just came up and I need to address it as soon as possible. I'll be back soon, I promise.

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Okay, I am back. Just put the hockey game on, though that is not why I had to step away from the computer. Far bigger things have come to bear than simply a hockey game. It involves checking the messages on my phone and I promise I will get to that story in due time. But allow me to get back to the original story that I left off on.

Amy asked if I wanted her to wait for me at the bus stop so I didn't have to walk up to the house, but I had a good idea of where I was going and Amy was supposed to go to the school to help with getting all of the orders organized and out to their respective sellers and I wasn't sure exactly what time I would be arriving, so far better to just go about things and let me fend for myself. Amy told me her two sons, Christopher and Ethan would be home in case I got there after she had left. The thing is, I haven't seen them in a while, I had missed the Christmas Eve party, and Amy had a broken ankle during the birthday party my family had thrown me last summer, so I hadn't seen them in better than a year. While I am sure that Christopher would know me, the same can't be said for Ethan, who is much younger. Anyway, I go to catch the bus. Based on the bus schedule I had all I had to do was walk down to the other end of the street I work and stand there and all would be good. I escaped work in ample time and made it to the bus stop in about 10 minutes, leaving me plenty of time to catch the bus. I double checked the bus stop sign and it did list the AV as being a bus that stopped there, so I settled in with my book and waited. And waited. And waited. And for good measure, waited some more. No bus. There were a couple of 1A buses that rolled by, buses that I could have taken but would have taken far longer to get to my destination, but given how long I was waiting, I was beginning to think maybe I should have taken one of those instead. So now I go looking for a clock and I see that my bus is running 25 minutes late. That isn't the best part though, I look underneath the bus stop sign to see that the stop has been discontinued for the AV bus, because of the BIg Dig that is taking place downtown. The Big Dig, not to be confused with Boston's Big Dig, is just as much a taxpayer waste as the Boston version. Basically it is a tunnel that will go from downtown under the Allegheny River and come up on the other side on Pittsburgh's North Side. The fact that there are already three bridges that go there from downtown (6th, 7th and 9th Street bridges) would make one think we have ample connection to the the North Side, but what is a half a billion dollars for a dig that goes to the very same location. As a result a number of streets downtown are closed and some bus routes have been detoured, including the one I wished to board. Instead, I could have just crossed the street at work and I would have been at the bus stop I needed, instead I walked out 6 or 7 blocks out of my way and missed the bus I wanted. The next one was due in about ten or so minutes, so I made the necessary correction to which bus stop I should be standing and after waiting a little bit more (the second bus was 15 minutes late) I managed to head out to my destination.

Finding the house wasn't a problem, proving my mastery of all things Mapquest and I arrived a little after 5:30 pm. Not too shabby I thought, I still might be able to visit for a while, I could catch a 1A back into town a little after 9pm, giving me 4 hours and change to play with (yes I could catch an earlier 1A, but I am dealing with the last possible bus to leave here before I am stranded).so after locating the house I ring the doorbell and Ethan answers. Of course I ask if Amy is home, though I am positive by now she has indeed left for hoagie distribution, so next I ask if Christopher is there and again I get a no. And it seems that Ethan has no idea who I am because he tells me to come back in an hour. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not upset by this development, I actually understand it. A guy Ethan doesn't recognize comes to the door, he shouldn't let me in. I figure the best thing I can do is go find a place to kill an hour and then come back. The problem is finding a place, first I start in one direction on the main drag and after about 5 minutes of walking I don't see anything, and I remember that I passed a Dunkin Donut the other way when I first arrived and guess that a coffee and a couple of donuts could easily occupy my time, so I head back the other way when I see Ethan running down the sidewalk trying to catch up to me. Apparently he called his mom and learned that in fact I am related to him and therefore can be trusted with going inside the house. Fred, my uncle, was the first to arrive that might know who I am, and we sat around laughing about what happened. Amy got there a little before 7pm and more laughing ensued. I got to do some family visiting, something I really need to do more of, and it was a pretty fun evening by Matt standards. And Fred offered me a ride home, which he really didn't have to do but was much appreciated as it was far quicker than relying on public transportation. Of course when we got to Oakland we ran into traffic because the Pitt-Georgetown game was letting out, a game that Fred was going to ask me to, but he was just offered the tickets that day and didn't have anyone to go with, and I was at work which made me relatively unreachable. Technically someone could call work and I would be allowed on the phone, but I don't give out my work number and I am still of the not willing to buy cell phone set, and a call to reach me at home would have went unanswered, since I left for his place directly from work.

Actually, missed messages are going to bring us to our next story, but first a little background. When I left 1360 AM last December, one of the first places I applied was to was KDKA 1020 AM. It is one of, if not the oldest radio station in America and the #1 station in the Pittsburgh market. At the time they were looking for a radio producer, something I had just a little bit of experience in doing. They are also owned by CBS Radio, which owns a handful of stations in the Pittsburgh market, one AM station as well as three FM stations 93.7 (CHR), 100.7 (Adult Standards) and 107.1 (country). I was in touch with Marshall Adams, the program director for KDKA and while the job I was applying for was filled, he asked for a demo of some of my work on those occasions where I guest hosted in Lynn's absense. I sent him a couple of CDs of my work and he was complimentary and said that they would keep my information on file. The thing about the business of radio, you never really know when someone is being polite because polite is good, or being polite because they actually like what you did. So it is hard to put any amount of weight to something like that, you hope for the best but are realistic that nothing may come of it.

It was recently annouced that one of CBS's FM stations, 93.7, was going to be flipping formats, going from CHR to sports talk, becoming the first FM sports talk station in the market (there are two on AM). Pittsburgh is a big time sports market, esepcially when it comes to the Steelers, and to a lesser extent, the Penguins and there are also plenty of people that follow the Pirates and the sports teams of the University of Pittsburgh, so an FM station devoted to sports has the possibility of working. And from a cost perspective, depending on how it is done, a sports talk format could be cheaper than a music format. You instantly lose the cost of paying music royalties and the salaries for DJs needed to man the daypart shifts (usually most stations these days will run jockless overnight) and save for whatever talent you are going to bring in that isn't satellite programming (which can usually be had for free via a barter agreement) the bottom line is somewhat lower. It also allows you the ability to stream cheaper, as the music royalty fees get doubled for those stations that also stream on the net and are a music format.

What does this have to do with missed messages you may ask? Well, even if you don't ask I am going to answer. As I mentioned I picked up the hoagies on Wednesday but I missed a phone call from Fred. Not for the basketball game, which while he thought of me for the game, he didn't think I'd be available, after all I was going to his house that night. But he did call to see if I needed a ride to his place, since he works in McKees Rocks, he passes by, albeit indirectly, both where I work and where I live on his way home. Because I was working I missed the phone call. Anyway, while getting this blog entry started I figured I could multitask and remove the old messages off of my phone. I knew Fred's message was still there, but I really hadn't checked them in almost a week. If the phone rings and I am home I may answer it, but usually if the phone rings there is a better than average chance I am in fact not home.

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Sorry, another break in the blog. While I am writing this I am also on and off a few different websites and during my bouncing around I managed to pick up another Swagbuck, which makes 45, so I had to head over to the website and pick up another $5 Amazon gift card. I am all about free stuff and if people want to hand me money for more books and stuff (there is plenty on Amazon besides books after all) who am I to argue?

Again we get back to our story. So I am sitting here, working on the blog and checking phone messages and who should be on there but Marshall Adams, program director of KDKA. Apparently he kept my info on file, which in and of itself is surprising since I submitted it a year ago, and he wants to talk to me. Now I don't want to get my hopes up too much here, but unlike previously when I was out seeking employment, this is a different animal, I really have barely been dipping my toes in the radio pool. spending most of my hours worried about my current job than exploring other possibilities. I dropped him a quick Facebook message today and will be calling tomorrow and maybe I will have some more information about what the phone call was all about. It could be something to do with KDKA, or it could be something to do with the new sports talk station, I really don't know at this point, though my curiosity is definitely piqued.

OKay, I have rambled more than enough, just a couple of odds and ends updates to get out of the way. First, I did pick up a couple of additional tokens in Scratchix this week, one for the DVD of the month, which I am sure will be relatively useless, you need to collect 10 of them in a month and I have 1 and only 7 days to get the other nine. The other was for the $30 Amazon gift card and it was the second of 10 needed, again I am not close to cashing that in, but at least I don't lose it in a week. And lastly the change meter moves a little again, another .26 and the new total is 139.78. The numbers are definitely down to start this year, but that is okay, I didn't expect it to be like last year, just hope it isn't an embarassing year for ye olde meter. And that kids is all.